36 hours without food

The problem with getting old is the lack of exercise.  Motivation dose not exit to hit the gym and sweat like a pig for a couple of hours and leave with an endorphin high. It is just too much work, too tiring and overly disciplined. It's something best left to the younger people who probably like to view themselves in full length mirrors. They like to look at themselves which is always very funny to see. I was a runner and my exercise usually consisted of stretching followed by a period on the treadmill and some weights. Running while going nowhere is mind numbingly boring and mostly a necessity in the Autumn come Winter time. The other good effect about exercising is weight control and it's possible to stuff your face as much as you like because it all gets burned off in the end. Except when old and not exercising. The weight now collects itself around my mid section and I worry about barely being able to see my feet. Let alone entire body starting to break down and sag. Loss of hair, man boobs, aches and pains. It's not a nice thing.

A year or more ago I heard of the five days on two days off diet. As a way to control weight and actually lose some. Unlike other diets which require the conscious change in eating habits this one doesn't change what you eat but rather how often you do eat. In a single week two days are taken off from eating at all. In ideal circumstances these days should be consecutive, which is asking a lot for a little tubby fellow like myself.  So 36 hours ago I decided to take some time off from food, because I really do need to lose a little weight.  Another secondary reason is it is cheap, because for 36 hours I didn't need to buy any food either. Great news for my wallet. I really am fed up with being as fat as I am and unfortunately getting glimpsed side looks from reflections in windows viewing the gut. The thing which extends over my belt. Further when having a bath it seems the bath water rises up higher than it used to, which is a demonstration of physics in reality. The water displace by my belly moves up, if I didn't float as much as I do now I'd drown.  Once upon a time, my core muscles used to be so tight and I was so slim it was a problem keeping my trousers from falling down so my belt was pulled tight. Whereas now the problem is wondering whether the seat is going to split if bending over and stretching them too much. Or whether there are enough holes in the belt, I even got one of those hole punctures.  Now bending over can be difficult. It is not at all a pretty sight. It had been a while since I last tried this fasting so it was interesting to identify what was happening yesterday and whether my clothes still fit.

Not having food for 36 hours didn't stop me from farting. Yep, I still farted throughout the day and used the toilet. What I did do is drink a lot of liquids because it is summer as well and this was good. There was a moment in the afternoon come evening when there were some stomach rumbles but I've now started to employ the cognitive method of coping. Simply engage your mind in something different make it occupied. The belt on my trousers had to be tightened and was more stable during the day when normally it would be loosened and tightened depending on when I ate. The usual intense postprandial need to sleep was still there after what would of been my lunchtime break. Except I hadn't eaten so this tiredness could be related to lack of sleep due to hot summer nights or it's just habitual. I generally just sit in a chair and close my eyes napping for a burst of ten to fifteen minutes. It partly shakes it off, but not all the time. I wasn't grumpy or tired generally over the day, but what I did feel was more energy and even alert. Perhaps the blood which would of gone to my gut had nowhere to migrate so fuelled my brain. What I did do was try and keep the image of getting an accidental view of my profile, thinking about this belly and how typically middle aged I looked. This was my motivation and I should now try and use this every week even if it is one day out of seven. The other thing I notice was the taste in my mouth and teeth, it felt like it needed a good brush and wash out. Possibly this was a combination of gastric liquids being intensified, or even mouth bacteria screaming for food to live off. The mental alertness levels lasted throughout the entire day. Which kind of striked me, there must be a optimal balance where the right sleep, food and drink consumption puts the body in a place of feeling awake and alert.

Maybe one of the lessons of life is to do things which are good for yourself but unpleasant. As the saying goes too much of a good thing is bad. However, over time the human body changes, it doesn't metabolise so fast and eating at the same rate will mean obesity. The biggest disease affecting modern day society, unless you happen to be in a country at crisis is being fat.  Regardless I must admit to enjoying breakfast this morning but will do my best to eat sensibly today and not try to make up for 36 hours of fasting by 36 hours of gluttony. Perhaps even a little exercise would be a good thing?

Some tips on losing weight

Losing weight is probably the most difficult thing a person can do, especially if the intention is t make it a permanent loss. I've lost weight on many occasions and on an equal number of occasions put it back on again. Talk about yo-yo dieting or what, in fact the name yo-yo should be replaced by dieter. I am a dieter in a broad sense of the word. Faced with a choice between a piece of toast and a bacon butty put in front of me, the bacon butty would be gobbled up in no time.  This is why I am overweight now and bordering on obese.  Which by the way may isn't really so fat when you are at that level at all. It's only a skinny person who can recognise an obese person, obese people just feel overweight not obese.  So given I belong to the group of dieters who do up and down I am just as worthy of putting some tips on weight loss as the next person. And certainly more so than may of the self sanctimonious people who think they are professionals.  Because if you haven't been there and walked a mile in my fat shoes then you're asking for a slap in the face, with my fat hand.

To lose weight successfully means recognising it is a life style change and it is something which will have to be watched every single day of your life. Because those get fat quick biscuits are always going to be on the supermarket shelf, therefore it is a matter of realising you can't pick them up. But the best thing you can do is avoid them like a vampire would avoid garlic, don't walk down the biscuit aisle ever.  Further to take this attitude and internalise it you should understand your body doesn't need as much as you think it does to survive food wise.  Except eating food can become a pleasure, except again when that pleasure is over indulged you get fat.  Sometimes it is necessary to actually not eat at all or to be so frugal with what you eat you learn again what it is to taste and not to gobble. Food savoured in your mouth because you have earned the right to eat it is so much more delicious than because you have a large plate of it in front of you and it has to go down as quickly as possible in order to give you a full up belly feeling, and the contentment it has.  Oddly I've found this full up belly feeling can come with a smaller portion. Without doubt mental attitude must come first and one way of reinforcing this attitude is to think of the reasons why your weight should be less than what it is now.

Obesity equates to illness, diabetes is the primary pain, then there is liver disease, then there is not so much the fact of illness but the inability to move about. To pick things up, find the right clothes or clothes which are big enough. Or there could be the future thought of repeated visits to a doctor or hospital because of a multitude of ailments associated with weight.  How much more painful it is being heavy on your joints than it would be if you weighed less.  Bodily wear and tear is a slow killer, so it is with being fat. A slow lingering death can be on the cards. If this is not good enough reason to lose weight then consider family, friends and people you love.  To stay around longer just so you can be a help to them. My grand daughter Princess J is the most precious happy little girl in my world, I love her to bits and I would love to be around to see her get married and even be a great grand dad to her children. My close as can be daughter Rock Chick who is a wonderful girl bringing up a wonderful family with a wonderful partner. I can only be of help if I am around and able to support them. Just as Sparkling Eyes is the love of my life I need to look after myself for her as well.  When I think of these reasons my mental attitude towards losing weight strengthens, even if I am still fat it's getting into the right frame of mind which will help me get somewhere.

So I've lost a couple of pounds in a couple of weeks, it might not be much but it is in the right direction, just think of how long it took to get as fat as you are now and the realisation is, it creeps up on you like an unrelenting but successful fat ninja. Here are my tips.

1. One pound in weight is about 3000 calories, understand losing weight is a slow and long term process don't take fortitude from losing more than two pounds in a week. In fact my personal belief is you should aim for one pound a week.

2. Exercise is necessary, even if you don't like it, it has to be done. But it does not have to be crazy stuff, there is nothing wrong with gentle exercise, walking is good. Yoga at home anything at all, even getting out in the garden for a couple of hours as long as it is physical and not sitting on your backside. Try to do something every single day not just at weekends. Don't strain yourself but do dedicate yourself to it.

3. Reduce the amount you eat. This is definitely easier said than done, but you will notice a difference and after the first couple of weeks get used to it.  When going to work I used to make two sandwiches, this was four slices of bread with filling.  Now I have only one sandwich.  I endeavour to sit down and eat it slower than I would normally eat it.  Over a month of home made sandwiches my lunchtime meals are now much easier to cope with.

4. Occasional treats. Allow yourself to have the odd treat at least once if not twice a week.  For being on a strict diet is not fun, this weight loss regime is looking at the long run not short gains.  If you have a bad day and eat or drink too much, then punish yourself by having a day of frugality.  Eating as little as you possibly can. This does not have to be then next day but if you can fit it in within the same week it will keep you on track again.

5. Steer clear of those things which you know are going to be no good for you in the long run. However if you need a treat go ahead break the diet and give yourself a treat and then return back to your diet. It is OK to have temporary breaks you are not out to do this in a single day, you are looking at months and months into the future.

6. Take a note of your weight, do this either once a week or once every two weeks, write it down on a piece of paper. You will need to come back to this and know the weight is dropping off, but do not under any circumstances look for a quick weight loss fix, in the end these never work.

7. Be conscious of your size and weight in everything you do.  Keep an eye on your figure in the mirror, when going to bed be conscious of how much your body sinks into the mattress. When walking up stairs feel the strain of carrying those extra pounds.  Accept you are heavy and accept now you are doing something about it.

8. Stick to set meal times and don't snack.  I always have a slice of toast for breakfast and then do not eat again for four to five hours.

9. Be gentle with yourself, you will get there, this is about perseverance, your life and the rest of your life, there will be slips, but like a boomerang return again to the diet.  You can do it.

10. Understand food, look at sugars, calories, fats, learn to cook from fresh and take time cooking. Be aware of hidden substances in processed foods, as the philosophers say, both knowledge and education give freedom. The freedom to choose and freedom to not follow the crowd.


It has nearly taken me a year to lose a stone in weight, it is July and I anticipate by August to be just a little bit more lighter than I am now and about one stone plus a little on last year. My trousers and jeans are feeling less stretched than they used to and I'm healthier, I try to take the stairs whenever I can, and set aside time each day as part of my day to walk part of the journey to work. After all I want to live a longer life and this is a long term pursuit.  I now do my best not to have sitting at home days where I do very little at all. It is tough and slow going, but progress is being made.

So the question is: To blubber or not to blubber?

Temptation the breaker of diets

Today I have taken two steps back on my diet.  Now this happens once in a while, it's like the desire to pig out on crap food is more than I can cope. As the saying goes

I can resist everything except temptation

No truer a work was spoken by Oscar Wild.  Possibly this desire was the result of a busy though boring day at the Fish Factory. As always there is very little time to get anything done and still hundreds of emails drop into my tray, so I took a day of ignoring them and am sure something will explode like a hippopotamus with constipation and a bloated belly. 

The day has definitely been boring and this led me to get off the bus earlier when going home.  I took a detour and by some remarkable quirk of fate passed a church which had it's door open and a sandwich board standing out side. I read the print and though behold like the burning bush of fire and tablet of commitments the sign said "Slimming Club."  However the forces of gluttony were at work, they were driving me forward like a frenzy of galloping horses on LSD. So it was I marched pass the sign with no real second thought at all, because there was a plan in my head.  It went along the lines of, first get a bottle of diet coke then hit the chip shop then head home. The coke was essential because it works so well with Jack Daniel's, however, I didn't get the coke first and meandered past the chip shop because there was still a hesitant part of my brain which hadn't quite bought into the need to eat carbohydrates and put on a couple of pounds this evening.  Thing is the hesitant bit was distracted, that's exactly what it was for a man in the shop spoke out the words "why don't you come in?" Shite, that was it, I had been hooked. A few minutes later I walked out of Frank's chip shop with an open portion of chips and the proprietor had thrown in a free roast potato, fecking great, just what fat lad needed.

So now in my boated belly state I sit drinking a diet coke and JD, diet on account I am still on a diet and need to rid even more pounds than I did this morning.  The thing is since the Chrimbo holidays I have managed to actually lose 7 or 8 pounds, my target being at least a stone.  It's been slow going and will be in reverse if I keep this up.  Oh temptation what am I going to do about you, why do you haunt me and play cat and mouse with my desires with little warning? 

In the meantime I hear of Rock Chick, Dangerous Sports lad and Princess J have all been ill, they have some kind of stomach bug which means it's flow out of both ends.  If only I had that bug, I'd pay to have that bug. No work for a couple of days and life spent on the John.  When speaking to Sparkling Eyes this evening I told her of my awful break on the diet front.  How I needed to get a phone-a-friend-diet-buddy, to help talk me through these episodes. Her reply was she'd probably not of picked up the phone on account of being busy and then she went into play with my desires and say I would be wanting to eat the mini pork pies in the fridge.

If only I were slim again, the dilemma over food wouldn't be a problem, it would all be burnt off exercising, running and hitting the gym. Unfortunately the only thing I been hitting is my own conscience by giving into temptation. All I need is the strength of Hercules but in the form of will power.  Someone give us break, or a bight.

Rice the gassious of carbohydrates - the fart food for short

It is normal for me to take lunch at a Chinese, but a couple of weeks ago I realised more than usual I had a whiff about me.  A kind of pong was going on. I'm sure it was related to the ingredients in the chicken and black bean sauce on steamed rice.  There is also garlic and chilli in this dish, but the pong was probably generated by the rice.  I believe rice is the food of farts. Or it is for certain western people, or maybe as said earlier it's the combination of ingredients.  So this week I began an experiment, but it was not just centred on this major culprit, I did my very best to hit every white carbohydrate which normally passed my lips. To try and find an alternative, which ultimately came down to brown bread sandwiches or rather my favourite of brown breads being malted granary. It's got grains in it and has a nice slightly nutty chewy texture. Every breakfast would be some kind of toast from this bread.  Lunchtimes were also brown bread sandwiches, I must admit though I personally don't like eating sandwiches all the time, but this experiment meant I had no alternative. I had to keep to it as closely as possible.  Figuring it would take maybe two to three days for the old food and effects to go through the digestive process.  Fortunately it was closer to one to two days.

The results were amazing, I mean absolutely amazing. A significant decrease in the number of farts. My breath didn't have a garlic like whiff to it after lunch, because I wasn't eating garlic any more. At night time I am prone to a few blistering explosions in the bed. These had nearly stopped, I was changing, no longer the epitome advert of a middle aged man with the farts, grumpy, moaning and always best to keep a few yards from. Yet at the same time I am fighting an addiction and love of carbohydrates.  I love pastries, the occasional white bread bit of toast, cakes and biscuits (which I just about keep at bay) and many other carb foods. Yet being in love with these foods is not socially acceptable, particularly if ever enclosed in a small space and feeling the urge to flatulent behaviour; it's the old lift (elevator) scenario I'm thinking about - where we have all been.  Farting means those people who are the closest to you suffer.  Unless they have some kind of sinus problem. It also means if you spend a lot of time undisturbed in a room then walk out of it and return you notice an invisible pong sits there.  Effectively you have been stewing in your own farty smell and not just breathing it, it has seeped into your clothes.  Your odour is no longer a high class EDT product nice to smell and attractant to others or so the adverts say, but rather one fat old and loyal dogs have near the end of their life, or cats. I remember Tiggy, he was a beautiful affection cat, but if you squeezed him to hard or he just sat around you purring for too long soon you'd realise his silent farts were as bad as your own.  Hetty's dog Barney was another example, he'd just lay on the floor nearby, occasionally wag his tail and occasionally drop a stink bomb.  I loved them both very much, more than anything in the world yet sometimes loving a pet can mean having to put up with a lot.  So the evaporation or greatly reduced smell around me was noticeable, certainly to me so I expect it may have been of notice to others as well.

There is only one solution and it is one which I don't like to ponder on too much. I have to give up on the high carbs.  Closely examine the glycemic index and fight my own addiction to food I have been brought up on.  Which at times is like trying to fight a sneeze. It's not easy, definitely not easy. I'm sure it is to do with the conversion of sugars during digestion and blood sugar levels, with this is the need to diet and exercise. Words which are like garlic and holly water to a vampire. I truly think controlling food intake and living a healthy life is probably the most difficult thing to do in the modern day.  Just looking at the bulletin boards of people affected by this phenomenon leads me to know I am not alone, if only I had a buddy I could talk to whenever the urge grabbed me, like an emergency service number.  But it seems with the number of fat farty people about these are rare individuals. The thing is you need someone who has been through the same experiences as you have, not one of those hypocritical skinny people who has never felt the cravings of a carb addition, not someone who has never experienced stuffing their face and still wanting more.  I need to stop this rant and get out for my Sunday walk, which is late now. At least outside I know there is a lot of fresh air. This room is starting to get a little stuffy.

24 hours without food

After a dicky tummy episode one morning I knew was something not right.  Having last eaten the previous evening I decided to continue with this abstinence.  So from 8 p.m. on one day to 8 p.m. the next I ate nothing hoping it would cure the shites.  My belief is intestinal acids build up and then incinerating the dirty little virus thing dwelling within the gut.  Just as it helps not to have a stomach of food which eventually would have to find it's way out.  However, I am not a biologist but it sounds reasonable enough to someone with their head screwed on.  Abstaining from food doesn't hurt either, some do it for religious reasons, others to diet. Whatever the reason it would have a multifaceted advantageous effect on me.  This belly could do without a few calories and the scales might even look on with happiness as well. I can hear them now, "get off ya fat bastard" if they could talk that is.
The other thought besides the need to stop running to the toilet, was this whole thing would be a test of my own determination.  Fasting for me is not something which comes naturally, whereas eating is, and starting in the evening meant all I had to do was endure a few hours before going to bed because there would be no desire to eat while asleep. Providing I didn't wake up in the middle of some erotic food related dream. Mind I don't remember my dreams much anyway. So it was, the day began.

I thought the morning would of been difficult, sitting in the kitchen and drinking a cup of tea listening to the radio. When normally it would of been toast, tea and radio. I did notice a feeling of just taking it easy and not needing to rush about. Probably this was the residual of a recent holiday and the post holiday euphoria kicking in again. I must admit the tea did have a better fuller taste to it than normal does. Perhaps this was linked to my expectation I was not to eat all day long and had to savour every drink from this moment onwards. Which reminds me I must learn how to make Indian Chai.  It wasn't until I was sat at my desk at work I could then feel my belly rumbling. It knew something was missing, but I just looked at the monitor in front of me and thought concentrate on work, do your job, if you do this then your mind will be taken off the need to eat.  It seemed to work, but waiting for lunch time to come took forever.  Again at lunch I know considered well I will not be spending money on food. If this is an exercise I can do on a more regular basis it could work out to save me some dosh. I do spend too much money on lunchtime food as I rarely make my own sandwiches.  Walking through the market at lunch time I could smell the open fast food stalls, one specialises in Nepalise the other in plane greasy burgers and there's a third does Caribbean food.  I could of gone over and bought something. But no, I carried on walking to the pub where I have my lunchtime coffee.  It's nice sitting in there. Getting my phone out I could spend more time catching up with the BBC news website and of course make a phone call to Sparkling Eyes.

While inside the pub someone had ordered a plate of fish and chips. The smell of the fish was pungent and I could feel my nostrils flare up. It was like if I could breath in deep enough I would be tasting this fish and chips, even if it was overly smelly.  The experience of being forced to smell it was awful. My belly was again having some weird stuff happen. It felt swollen on account of the undiagnosed self diagnosed IBS. It had become solid as a football. This is one of the things I hate about being overweight, having a belly which means I don't get to see my feet unless I'm sat down. It's not a pretty sight.  So with purpose, I managed to get through the afternoon, constantly trying to distract myself by getting on with my work. I had a similar temptation period after leaving work and popping in the pub for a pint of Guinness, some lads had ordered burgers and chips. Bastards. The smell of those chips almost made me break, but I wasn't going to now, only a couple of more hours and it would be a full 24 hours.

Later in the evening I did eat and managed a full 24 hours.  However, I should of gone through to the next morning again just to make sure the belly virus was burnt to hell.  Missing out on a day's food made me feel a little better about myself and it probably has helped a little in trying to lose weight as well.  A full pound in weight is 3500 calories and an hour's walk is about 450 calories. It sure is a lot of energy.  There are two parts however to a diet, one eating less and two exercising more.  Damn it's tough to, because exercise gives you an appetite just when you should not eat the desire is so much more. 

Three Salads

For three days I made my own lunch, each one was a tub of salad, the ingredients of which were bought on a Sunday. This is the start of healthy eating, of the new me, I'm fed up of feeling fat, uncomfortable and like nothing actually properly fits me. Except today I didn't eat a salad and went to the usual Chinese.  But for three days I ate food which had been grown from the ground. Food which even prepared still looked close to its natural state. Why did I break down? Tomorrow is a new day an new start, there isn't enough food there to make a day four of salad. I'll try and do something else. Hit the shops for a sandwich, made with salad instead of eating inside. Or maybe I could use my imagination, use the existing bits and pieces and see what turns out, it could be another vegetarian feast. Which makes me wonder, do vegetarians feast at all?  I shouldn't of eaten those three dark chocolate biscuits earlier, I need to get on the road again. The straight road not one which twists and turns, taking detours at every fast food place there is. Not one which desires a curry at the weekend. Exercise. This should not be a dirty word, yet it is something I don't do and heard on the radio most adults don't but yet this is the main ingredient to a healthy life, to living long, fighting all sorts of human illnesses. From cancer and heart disease to illnesses of the mind. That's it, it's all in the mind. When I see food I don't really need it, I am feeding the desire, but hell the desire to eat is a pretty strong one.

Got to think. When I die will they need six skinny men to carry my coffin or will it be a fork lift truck?  Exercise, it's almost like garlic to a vampire, hmm garlic is nice when mixed with ginger it's the basis of a lot of foods. Back to food again, how can this meandering stop?  Three salads, tomorrow lets make it a mixed salad sandwich, one day and I'll try to see it as a little blip, better than a big fat elephantine looking man.

Day two of a healthy lifestyle and an old picture

Well it's been day 2 of a healthier life style, which has consisted of not eating as much as I would normally and then going to the supermarket to by lots of salad stuff.  The salad isn't going to last long because I've already eaten half of it.  It takes a lot of salad to feel full up, and it takes a long time of preparation.  Especially if you include the shopping for it in the first place.  Overall though, it's not been too bad.  Lunch consisted of a sandwich and a cup of coffee.  Prior to this breakfast consisted of one piece of toast.  I think I have got to learn to eat slower.  To savour food, because there's not much of it when you're dieting.  Exercise has not been on today's agenda.  Perhaps it's a matter of getting up early in the morning and taking a quick walk or run before delightful breakfast.  I could eat some more salad with my toast tomorrow, maybe it'll make all the difference.  If I'm exercising tomorrow then I also have to go to bed early to get up early.  Healthy life is hard work, it will be killing me.

It is surprising how deprivation of a big lunch time meal can effect the mind.  For after finishing work I nearly didn't go to the supermarket.  I saw the chip shop in the square and a thought flashed in my mind.  A temptational thought, to go and buy a portion and a pie.  I resisted, quickly turning and walking off in another direction.  I could consider making my own sandwiches tomorrow.  Thing is the carbs again.  It's the bread.  It makes me wonder what working class people used to do when there was not such a large supply of carbs.  Unless of course they were the main food source.  But in those olden days people were not fat, there was not a plentiful supply of food.  Food was a scarce thing, and even eating one meal a day considered good.  Hadn't they died of all kinds of diseases those people of them olden days would of lived a lot long than the fat people of today do.

I have a post card of a young girl from the 19th century.  I saw the original photograph at the National Portrait Gallery in London and just fell in love with it.  It's been pinned to a wall for years.  Here she is on the right.  The photo would of been taken with a plate camera. It is of Adelaide Passingham by Evelyn Myers and is a sepia platinotype.  The quality of these old black and white pictures is unbelievable.  Nothing colour wise can ever match up to them.  Not even today.  There are two reasons, firstly the range of tones in the print are richer as platinum is used rather than silver, the second is biological.  Light receptor cells in the human eye are outnumbered phenomenally by those which see black and white.  It's thought platinum pictures of this type can last thousands of years.  So Adelaide will be around a lot longer than most of us.  These pictures show how colour is really no more than a second thought no matter the general belief. This was taken in 1889, so Adelaidie, it would of been nice had the photographer asked Adelaide to open her eyes, head tilted and glance toward the camera. The down caste head posture although enticing gives Adelaide a simultaneous sultry and downtrodden appearance.  I wonder if her hair was full of mites, it's a tangled mess and no self respecting woman nowadays would allow her hair to look like this. Adelaide, is relatively clean looking but at this turn of the century who can say.  Historically, working class people washing and their personal hygiene may have been in doubt. There will be few pictures of this type ever done again.  Simply because of the cost.  Platinum was cheap when the Platinotype Company first produced the paper, but over a period of twenty odd years, the price increased 52 times.  So it was abandoned and other cheaper chemical methods used such as the palladiotype.  Whatever, this picture is certainly going to be around for a long time.

I do like the photo, even by today's standards it his a high quality image.  I also bet Adelaide never got fat as obesity was a rarity in them olden days.

Things to think about when living healthier

Today I half re-started a healthier life style, only one piece of toast for breakfast, only one plate full at the eat-as-much-as-you-like Chinese, and only one nectarine for supper.  This evening I have walked for one hour, I've weighed myself as well.  It isn't a good weight and just confirms what is already known, I'm fat.  It no doubt will take a long time to lose weight and there is a lot of effort which is going to be needed.  Maintenance decisions.  Like making my own lunch rather than buying from cafés. This all takes time, time to hit the supermarket, time to then chop up, combine, flavour and box up foodstuff.  Inconvenience of then carrying said foodstuff with me and storing it until lunch.  I thought about this while at lunch and wondered whether it was actually better to go without eating anything.  Have a coffee, then in the evening make something when at home.  The problem is, the longer you go without food, when it does come to eating you're more likely to gorge yourself.  Well I am, plus drinking alcohol tends to make me want to eat chips, so I've not been to the pub or eaten chips either.  So for one day, I have been relatively sensible.  Except losing weight takes a lot of time and a lot of effort and has to be persevered over months.  Just as we are coming into Chrimbo and the time of gluttony.  I can't think of a more perfect reason to be dieting and a more perfect trying period.

I've just tried to work out many calories a walk for one hour burns up.  Apparently this is related to the speed of the walk and how much you weigh.  For me it works out at about 5 calories a minute, and there I was thinking it to be in the region of 8 calories per minute.  Way less than estimated, no wonder it takes so bloody long to lose weight.  There is no doubt about it, I'm going to have to consider reducing food portion sizes as well.  I saw a TV program which announced we do not have to eat the size portions we do.  It's not necessary at all.  Whether I like my food or not, but I do, this is an important factor.  To be serious in this life choice I'm going to have to change my name to Rabbit Man, and eat lots of green vegetable things.  Then I wonder, if this is day one, how are the successive days going to pass.  The other thing I found out was for every ten years a person ages their metabolism slows down by 5 percent.  This is not a helpful factor in weight loss and old age.  If my metabolism slows down any further I'll be in suspended animation. But, I've heard green tea is good to increase metabolism, so have drank about 3 cups of it today.

The problem is, there are just too many temptations around me as well.  I have to put things out of sight, like biscuits.  For it's as though there is some automatic must each mechanism my body runs by.  Without realising it I can tuck into a few biscuits and dunk them in a cup of tea very easily.  Even if a second on the lips is an inch on the hips, it's this automatic response I have to be conscious of.  It has to be made non automatic.  Or should I be saying, hide from sight or you'll never fit in those tights.  I could go for this saying were I a Shakespearian actor, but I'm not.  So it will have to be some other more apt ditty.

Lastly, I could use the scare tactic like the government does on cartons of cigarettes.  You know the ones "smoking kills" and "smoking harms unborn babies."  The reality is putting weight on will lead to an early death, live healthy and live longer.  Feel better and then get to see more of the people you love, the young ones as they to grow up in the world.  This is a compelling thought.  OK Rabbit Man tomorrow, don't forget to purchase some celery!  Will do fat boy.

What it cost to lose one pound in weight

Losing weight is bloody difficult.  It's difficult for a reason.  It was Oscar Wilde who said "I can resist everything except temptation" no truer word has been spoken when it comes to food.  Food which tastes good. But food with a taste may not actually be healthy.  For example, chips.  Chips with salt, vinegar and perhaps a little bit of tomato sauce.  They're hot, you've just bought them and the vinegar is steaming off, as you take a nicely coated chip the waft of vinegar stings your eyes just a little bit, you place the chip in your mouth and it explodes with salt, vinegar and steaming heat which sometimes may burn your mouth.  But it tastes very nice.  Especially after a pint or two, or particularly on a cold day.  When it's raining the difficulty then becomes keeping the rain off your chip bag so it doesn't get too soggy by the time you are half way down the bag.  You know what I mean, don't you?  And if anyone hasn't had a hot portion of chips from a chippy then they haven't lived.  Cholesterol thumping, zillion calories bad for you, but hell don't they taste goooooood!!!  Which is as good a reason as any why it is bloody difficult going on a diet and losing weight.

So to help I've tried to understand what it takes to lose weight by spending a few minutes looking at web sites and reading bits and pieces.  Only of course to then check out something infinitely more interesting.  But the facts are along the lines of, to lose a single pound in weight you have to burn 3400 calories.  I didn't add an extra nought this is the figure I got.  So, if you had to lose ten pounds in weight then you would have to somehow burn up or reduce food consumption to the value of 34,000 calories.  This is now becoming obscene.  But I haven't finished.  When I go to the gym and do my fat man running routine I get disappointed at seeing the number of calories which have dropped off in a half hour session.  After which I am pretty well shagged out and am not up to do much more aerobic exercise.  Half an hour burns approximately 350 calories, give or take a little.  The amount burnt off depends on how much you weigh, your gender and I guess how honest you are with the effort.  I notice some people will stand with their feet astride of the running belt while it spins round and they have a moment's rest, this is cheating, cheating, I so wish I could stand for an hour and lose weight and not break a sweat.  So losing weight, which nobody actually does, like how can you lose weight, and if you did where would you lose it?  So reducing your weight by one pound will take approximately five hours of continuous running.  If this is, my calculations are correct.  A single pint of Guinness is approximately 350 calories, and most other pints of beer will be more or less around this mark.  Again this magic number is the same as the effort to run for half an hour.  So I'm now feeling like I am not actually getting anywhere.  I also found a new fad in training techniques, it was to build up muscle and not just to spend half an hour running or rowing.  The reason behind this seems to be as your muscles get bigger they burn up more calories when they are doing nothing than a smaller set of muscles.  Weird.  Read it for yourself.  Of course when I tried to have a closer look at these web sites promoting this type of exercise I only got so far, because they then wanted to lighten my wallet.  This wasn't the kind of weight loss I had in mind.  Scientifically though, I don't know.  I just don't know if this is something someone has said or whether it has been justified.  Then to become a fat cat web site owner, I expect it might mean a few porkies have to be told now and again, although strictly speaking not entirely porkies but you know what I mean.

Fact, to lose weight you have to reduce your calorie intake.  This will mean either not eating so much or changing your eating habits.  So now when I have a portion of chips I no longer eat the whole portion.  I'll eat some of it and throw the rest away.  I wish I could say the same about chocolate, but I can't.  Changing eating habits is hard.  Bloody hard.  Saying this one easy method I came across and is quite common sense, is to masticate every mouth full of food for 30 chews.  This allows the saliva to do it's work and prepares it better for digestion.  Further it takes time.  This is an important factor.  For with any meal it is only after about twenty to thirty minutes the stomach actually starts to feel as though something has been eaten.  I mean.  Given you were in an eating competition you could absolutely stuff your face for thirty minutes before feeling the need for a good puke.  It's quite simple, just take your time while eating.  I sat with my plate of Chinese at lunch time and managed a unique feat.  Reading the news online via mobile phone and counting from one to thirty while eating.  I didn't think it was possible but I did it.  One side of my brain must of counted and the other read the day's news.  There's not a great deal more I can do on account of only have two sides to my brain so I probably maxed it out.

Lastly, it is a fact the brain gets pretty hot when it is working.  It has a unique system of keeping itself cool.  It's own radiator in a sense.  This is the Cerebral Spinal Fluid (CSF).  Now I'd of thought if the brain runs hot then it would be possible to use up a lot of calories just by thinking.  The CSF isn't pumped around the brain as far as I know, but it is there to provide temperature control.  So in one sense it's possible to say the brain can act like a muscle.  As muscles exercise they get hot and burn energy, as a brain exercises or thinks it too gets hot.  The only thing with a brain is it does not have muscles in it.  So I'm not entirely sure why it gets hot.  Maybe it's because of all the neurons firing.  Well better to be a neuron than a moron.  So I still have no idea of sitting here and thinking of exercise or thinking of food actually helps to reduce weight.  In any case it does keep me entertained.  And I haven't got up once in search of a chocolate biscuit.  So it must of worked.