Too much sugar and a little Nietzsche

Back at the Fish Factory, the world revolves again on another chaotic circuit of too many Fish and not enough sharpened utensils to deal with them.  We'll soon be up to our eyeballs in the little blighters.  As if this was the only thing I had to put up with, as it turned out to be another sleepless night with Big Momma up and down to the loo tinkle tinkle.  Her diabetes kicking in.  There was an empty jar of marmalade in the washing up bowl so this was a clue.  She doesn't understand sugar should now be off the menu and is acting like other diabetics I have encountered, this totals five.  It's like the illness of the millennium will be diabetes, who fashionably has it and who fashionably doesn't have it.  It's beyond ironic when on this morning's news I heard how there is just about enough food at this time to feed the population of the planet, with some groups of people spending up to 80% of their income on food and still suffering from starvation.  There has got to be something wrong.  I sure bet those unfortunate persons don't suffer from diabetes.   What they'd do for a sugar lump?  It would be funny if it weren't so tragic.

I got back early from the Fish Factory on account of feeling very much a zombie, in fact there were probably zombies out there who felt better than me, and lay down on my bed.  Two hours later I felt a little better.  The head feeling spaced out thing had in most part been satisfied.  But a wave does hit me now and again, then it washes over my brow, I shake off the foam and re open my eyes.  I sure hope I can get some sleep tonight.

Here's a quote I cam across yesterday but didn't want to add it to the BLOG as Mr Aristotle got in the way and afterall there is too much of a good thing.  It's by a German bloke who a little like Aristotle did a lot of thinking, I was surprised when I did a google search to find he said some other familar things which can be found in everyday language. Here it's about opinion, the sentiment is thought provoking..


“You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.” - Friedrich Nietzsche.

I like this.  It speaks for itsel and suggests one individual has the forsight to understand it's not worth carrying on a discussion or arguement.when there are differences of opinion and neither party are going to convince one or the other of being right or wrong.  It's the kind of thing you might come out with when totally exhausted and rather than using the "I can't be bothered" ubiquitous moron phrase Nietzshe gives it some style.  Also it could suggest there has been a failing from one of the parties involved.  Or from both.  Especially if they felt they had not been heard.

I wonder if there were many fat people around in Nietzsche's day?  I'm sure there would of been quite a few people with their opinion on it.

Habits

Yesterday I went to the gym.  It being a Sunday and late morning meant there was hardly anyone about.   I like it this way.  When there's no queuing up to use the machines and no need to worry how fat I look if I happen to see myself in the mirror.  And I did, and I do, look fat.  But while there I hit the running machine and even managed to do a straight 15 minutes jog without stopping in between walking stints.  I observed my breathing wasn't too bad, which is a good sign.  Fat or not, being able to breath is important.  Catching your breath can limit the amount of time you can exercise.  Like being weak and unable to lift weights.  My knee began to twinge later on so I'll have to watch it.  Sometimes though it is just a matter of persistence and taking it easy.  Not overdoing anything.  Getting into the habit is important.  Which reminds me of a quote I come across the other day.  Attributed to Aristotle

"We are what we repeatedly do, excellence is therefore not an act, it's a habit."

Quite an interesting thing to say when you think about it.  About striving to do the best you can but more than this to make it the very best possible.  It obviously takes a lot of effort and attention to do.  At the moment I'm half way fat so, if I were to be excellent at it, I'd be really fat.  Though I don't think this is included in the measure of the quote.

I went and looked at bicycles this afternoon.  Again thinking about increasing the amount of exercise I do.  A little disappointed I walked out of the shop, just not being able to make up my mind or be inspired by anything I saw there.  On the way back home I had a pint in a pub and enjoyed the sunshine.  It chilled me and just the one pint seemed to have a mildly intoxicating effect.  Maybe it was yesterday's exercise.  I don't think I'll put too much weight on it.  After all there is too much weight which goes on the machine.

Now tomorrow to start an excellent habit.

What makes me happy and chilled

There really is never enough time in the day to do all the things which have to be done.  This I've learnt at the Fish Factory, it just don't stop.  But I do get a chance to breath every now and again. Otherwise I'd be turning blue, or fainting all over the place. Except for today.  Today I can categorically say I have not worried as much as I normally would.  This is because tomorrow I get to see Sparkling Eyes.  A sleep, followed by a short train ride, followed by a short underground hop, followed by a much longer train ride and then I'll be there, on the doorstep, moi.  Knowing I am just about to get away from it all and see Sparkling is like being given a dozen tranquilizes, I've had the feeling that nothing was actually going to bother me.  When one of the little fishes kept nipping at my heals, I just let it go coz there was nothing more I was going to do and certainly not by the end of the day.  It was almost like the little fish really just didn't get it.  What pond I wondered were they swimming in coz it certainly wasn't the one I was in, coz I'd know, this one was calm and easy going and not giving a second thought.  Yesterday there was a fire alarm at the Fish Factory and precious time was lost standing outside in the beautiful sunny weather.  Chatting rather than doing work.  This fortunate break in the afternoon was also very relaxing.  So when I returned back to the Factory I just didn't have any more zing left to get on with what had to be done.  It's like I had began calming down. 

This evening I checked out FaceBook and Sparkling had added a comment, it seemed she had a little tizzy.  Rock Chick had responded with a comment about tidying up the house.  Oh I thought.  I'm forewarned now, don't drop any crumbs, leave shoes around or be untidy otherwise I'll be in trouble.  But I don't think it would worry me too much if I did get into trouble, because it would mean I am in Sparkling's company and I am not in her company every day.  I could hear her curse at me, huff at me and blow my house down.  I'm sure it won't be as bad as that but she can definitely huff when she wants to, and let me say every huff is lovely.  lol.  OK I'm sucking up, just in case she gets to read this.  No. But, I'd be in a state of happiness which is what would matter more than anything.

Anyway talking about being chilled out and not letting things get under my skin.  I watched a vid on youtube last night as well.  It was a sketch from a man who was in an airplane crash.  It was the plane which crashed into the Hudson River.  Everyone survived it.  But at the time this man had three realisations which hit him and he now carried around with him every day of his life.  One was how short life is, and how he had kept putting off things.  It made him realise to do those things he had kept leaving and waiting.  Another was how he had wasted a lot of time and had been negative.  His his ego got in the way of things.  In the way of his relationships with people around him. Subsequenly he calmed down and said since the accident he hadn't had a single arguement with his wife, and just as importantly he became an even better father to his child.  Lastly, he said he had no longer became afraid of dying, it was as though everyday had been a preparation for it and it wasn't so bad after all.  I think what he learnt was actually how to live his life, his life, his experience and now how much more he treasured those around him.  I think this says, of all the things in our lives it is other people around us which make us happiest and he had found this out and also learnt the role he played.  In all it sounds like a self enlightening experience.

I wonder what thoughts I'd think if I had a near death experience.  Better make sure I tidy up after me then, hadn't I?

13 is a lucky number

There is superstition about the number 13.  People think it is unlucky, in some places it is considered so unlucky they do not have a 13th floor, row of seats on a plane or go into work on Friday 13th.  But what are the values of a 13 which make it lucky in an unfashionable way?  The big one which comes to mind is a "baker's dozen" which is 13.  I'd rather have a baker's dozen than just 12 any day and especially if this number were the winning last number on a lottery ticket. I mean, it makes sense, if everyone dislikes the number 13 and 13 is a number which comes up in a lottery then all those who didn't pick because of superstition would be pretty stupid.  The Friday just gone was Friday the 13th.  It did not stop me from going into the Fish Factory.  In fact I had a dental appointment in the morning of Friday the 13th.  Now if the opportunity of lady luck to abandon me was going to take place it would of been at the dentist of all places.  All was fine.  It went as smooth as any other check up I've had with no problems. The number 13 is considered lucky in by Sikhs as 13 in Punjabi means "yours" as in to give to their god.  Whilst in Judaism the age 13 represents the time of manhood and Bar Mitzah.  Whilst in Italy 13 again is considered lucky although I could not find the reason why.  Note in a pack of cards there are 13 to each suit, but it doesn't stop people playing with cards.

In a different example, what of all babies which are born on the 13th?  Does it mean these babies should have their entire lives blighted by the superstition of others?  That they should be branded?  Of course not.  For sense actually takes over and I am sure any expectant mother who had a baby on Friday the 13th would love that baby just as much as a mother who had one the day before.  In math, 13 is both and odd number and a prime number so it is rare and beautiful.

So the conjecture for today is: 13 were it not for superstition the number 13 would just be an integer, no different from any other integer.  On all accounts superstition in this case has no logical basis, for how many people who are seriously superstitious have had consistently bad luck ever Friday the 13th?  None.  It's not possible, unless they are stupid enough to go out and find it.  So 13 is just like any other number.  Therefore just as lucky as well.

What's Insomnia? - let me sleep on it

Recently I seem to be suffering from insomnia.  But I don't think it is entirely my own fault, it's with the help of outside forces.  And I'm not talking about anything supernatural.  There is of course the usual things, but then there is the unusual things.  The result though is the same, no matter what it is, what I do I end up waking up some time in the middle of the morning or night and staying awake.  It is getting irritating to say the least. Here's a little list.

Stress at work
Big Momma getting up 10 times a night to have a tinkle (she's diabetic).
Not exercising enough so not physically exhausted.
An over active mind - lay down and then find it runs faster than a cheetah after a deer.
Pigeons in the roof who like to get up at first light - 4 a.m. to 5 a.m. ish.
Morning sunshine so hard it bounces of the walls under the curtains and it feels like an electric arc light is on.
Foxes who like to scream in the middle of the morning - they sound like they are in pain.
Being too hot in bed - the weather has really warmed up and the house gets hot.
Cat or cats.
House being generally noise conductive rather than dampening i.e. Big Moma gets up and everything heard.
Having good hearing
Drinking coffee or tea too late at night so effectively having a cafine hit.
High blood pressure - I am sure I have tinitus it's like hearing an old TV starting up all the time but I am learning to treat it as a friend.
Not getting enough sleep, leading to trying too hard to sleep leading to not getting sleep.

So there you have it a few of the little things which contrive to prevent me from getting a good nights sleep.  Sometimes I'll end up with maybe 4 hours.  Then I am a walking zombie the rest of the day.  Then nobody can get an enthusiastic reaction out of me because how can you be enthusiastic when you're grumpy, tired and ready to kill at the drop of a hat?  It's not possible.  Certainly not when you have been fighting it for nights on end.  So it must all mount up somewhere.  All the lost sleep.  Someone is steeling it in the night.   I'm also afraid it may end up hallucinations, I'll see things floating about me which shouldn't be there.  Like bright green rabbits with fangs, or find I am walking awake and sleeping.  Where the dream world encroaches on the awake world and then the most difficult thing of all will be trying to work out which one is real and how to react correctly.  If I'm asked a question by a Pooka (large invisible white rabbit - as in the film Harvey) will I end up talking to it, replying and then have other people react around me as if I am going crazy.  Well they most likely will.  I'll then be carted off with a white jacket wrapped around me to a nicely padded room.  Where hopefully it will be quiet.  If it is quiet then I'll eventually get some sleep.

So it seems there is no choice for the insomniac.  You have to quitely start losing your marbles, bit by bit, then hopefully some carring sympathetic doctor can have you sectioned away where you get a couple of months being given back all the sleep you'd lost in the first place, curtisy of a relaxed, quiet, fox free, cat free, Big Momma free, non sound conductive and dimley lit environment.

Someone section me, please.

I just learnt to use a toaster

This may seem odd, but I think I have only just learnt how to use an electric toaster.  Not use it as in to turn in on, but to actually toast the whole slice of bread.  For years I have been dropping bread into the slot vertically.  Then I have though why was it the toast engineers never made a toaster big enough for the bread?  The only conclusion I came to was they were using small slices of bread, a bit like the small loafs available to people on a diet.  Which I haven't been on by the way.  Then about a week ago for some unknown reason I dropped the bread into the toaster horizontally, and to my amazement it still fitted the slot.  Pushed the handle down and waited for it to cook. So after a minute or two, hey presto.  Viola.  The entire slice, or rather slices of toast were toasted.  Being a little stupid it has taken me a long time to work out.  All those years I have been eating toast with the top part not quite browned.  Someitmes I'd turn the bread upside down half way through just so there would be more part toasted bread.  Other times I would resort to using the toaster on the gas stove, which takes a lot longer.  I always think they engineers of the gas stove purposesfully made it so the flame was so far away it would use more gas to do the toast than needed as well.  In these moments of impatience I'd resort to a little trick of holding the bread closer to the flame by lifting the pan up.  It may have shaved a minute or so of the time, but whatever it did the whole slice was uniformly toasted.  Unlike the electric toaster.  So now I have eventaully gained my black belt in toast making.  Well they say it does take years to get a black belt.  If you don't watch it though you can end up with black toast and that certainly isn't a nice thing to have.

Lists to do things

Sometimes there is a state of mind in which to be when about to do something.  I wrote a list.  Which is always a good place to start but it doesn't mean I'll get around to the things on the list.  One was to book a dental appointment which is very much a state of mind thing, where I need at least a week to prepare myself.  Practice opening my mouth as wide as I can and then leaving it open for as long as I can.  The other item was to get my hair cut.  Unfortunately this seems to have been more down to the availability of the hairdresser than being in the right frame of preparation.  The last two weeks has seen the Easter holidays so each hair dressers has been full of sprogs.  Sometimes mothers with sprogs in tow.  There may only be one of them getting a hair cut but for some reason the whole family has to sit there.  Then the siblings have to run amok.  They have energy and it needs to be used up, sitting in a shop just doesn't do it. So walking through the door of a hairdressers on days like this requires being prepared for a headache.  Ear plugs, paracetamol and any other over the counter drugs which help.  I do wonder whether I was as bad as those sprogs at their age. No can't be.  Seeing as it was so long ago I really can't tell.  I just hope I wasn't, because today's sprogs are a good reason not to propagate the human race. So my hair is getting longer not for lack of mental want to get it cut but out of personal sanity.  Although my list only has two items they are important items, well I don't want to overload myself.

This morning as I had just began my journey to the Fish Factory, I saw an odd sight.  There was a cat on a garage roof, crouched down as though it were about to pounce on something, but I couldn't see what it was.  And there was a magpie lunging in at the cat and screeching loud.  It made the typical magpie warning sound,  much little like a very creaky door.  This magpie was semi hovering and swooping on the cat, getting close but not too close.  Making enough noise so every other creature knew the cat was there.  I reached into my pocket and took out my phone.  Just about to start filming when the cat sat up having given up on it's ready to pounce pose.  It was completely ignoring the flapping noise making magpie, almost to the point it make me wonder if the cat had decided the bird didn't exist.  The cat saw me and maybe the magpie saw me because they both seemed to stop.  Their list of things to do was obviously a bit different from my own.  Magpie's, harass a cat even if it could kill you, cat's stalk and prey on some smaller unsuspecting animal.

There I was thinking my cat Stinky had mental health issues.

Stinky

I have a belief that Stinky our cat has some personality defect, or simply is just fruit and nuts.  He has a bad habit now of sitting his furry arse down and just pissing around the house.  There are little hot spots or rather wet spots where he does this.  So at every opportunity I get I throw him out in the garden.  Now the little bugger must be saving his piss up because 9 out of 10 times he will plonk his backside on some dirt and let rip.  So why he does this I don't know.  I do know he also has a phobia about going out of the house so it makes things worse.  He will not of his own accord meow at the door to go out.  He'll meow like a banshee to get in, but not to go out.  He is very particular about his dirt tray as well.  If it is even the smallest bit soiled he'll not use it a second time.  It is like a one use only throw away option. So it's not too difficult to come to the conclusion he has some kind of anxiety issues.  In the meantime if stroking, loving and caring for him doesn't help I'll have to ask him whether he would like to take up a different occupation other than that of cat.  Like fur coat.  No.  I jest.  I'd never do it.  But I can't help it if he pushes the buttons.  For now I'm sure he has pissed somewhere else and I'll not say where it is but it was in another room which wasn't the toilet.  So watch out Stinky, whether you are suffering from a mental illness or potty training you are now officially getting on my tits.

Afternoon naps

Over the last four days I have been getting in an afternoon doze.  Just laying down for an hour, closing my eyes and drifting off to sleep.  It has done the world of good.  I'm beginning to feel sane, real, alive.  Sleep is a wonderful thing, when the body doesn't get enough it fights back and boy do you know it.  Thing is I'm back at the Fish Factory today.  I can hardly see dropping off to sleep for an hour while people around me carry on with their de scaling will be allowable.  Damn.  It'll hardly be an example as a middle fish to the little fish.  I'm going to need match sticks to prop open my eyelids and do the best I can not to let my eyes roll back.

Come on day, lets see what you got.

Symptoms of falling to pieces

The last few days I think I been falling to pieces.  An arm here, a foot there.  Just dropping off all over the place.  Its littered with bits of me.  I no longer look the whole man I used to be, on account of the bits which have fallen off.  I have just began to realise it this evening, but otherwise it was difficult to tell.  It's like standing in crap.  When trodden in there isn't an immediate smell, it takes a moment or two as you are walking along to realise there is something untoward following you.  A stink.  At this point you understand where it has come from.  Unless you just happen to have a bad case of the runs and didn't run quick enough to the closest loo.  I recall a story L & B man told me about when he got caught for speeding his car.  He desperately needed to relieve his bowels.  Not vowels, bowels.  He was lucky he didn't crap himself while he was being given a ticket.  Though I must admit the story was amusing, it was the way he told it.  I now recognise the signs.  I have not been completely on form.  On account of having fewer body parts, they're scattered about the house.  I don't know if it was the royal shedding, or whether it was the prospect of having a nice long weekend, which continues with tomorrow as well.  My body has just shut down.  There has been no get up and go but more rather of lets sit down not move or do a thing and slob out.  Stuffy nose, loss of motivation, sneezing.  Unless it's hay fever, which I have never had.  It might be.  Who knows.  I don't.  So I've been falling apart, my body has been fighting back and saying it has had enough and wants to rest.  Do nothing.  My mind probably joined in at some point as well, but as with the standing in crap it's taken a day or two to realise it.

Tomorrow I'll try and pick up some of the pieces, motivation prevailing I hope.  Check out the corner shop for some body superglue.  Then put myself back together, in one piece.  All will be fine then.  Unless I forget my left from my right, or what direction it is best to screw my head on.  It's clockwise, I'm sure it is. OK one more day of holiday left.  I can do it.  As the saying goes "pull yourself together man," damn, better hope all the bits are there otherwise that saying might have to be changed.