Being human is a funny disposition. If you're reading this then it is likely you are human as well, very, unless it is long after I am dead, we've wiped each other out and some alien species has managed to get hold of all this digital data to find out what the long lost species called humans were about. I just hope they have a good laugh, given they know what humour is and don't confuse it with human. Human humour rather. It is funny being human, especially in understanding yourself. a funny thing getting a hold of yourself and understand who you are, what makes you tick, what makes you annoyed and then trying to take control of those things when they do you no good. For example, stumping your toe on a table while at home with a lot of people around you and your instant reaction is to jump up and swear blue murder you will throw the table out and chop it into little bits as well as the cat, dog or anyone else who gets in your way. To observe human behaviour and to be part of this wonderful experiment of life has it's very funny moments. Especially those which start of as an absolute pain, the ones where you catch yourself in the middle of a sigh. The sigh which says "Oh no, go away and bother someone else." There is then the mental tussle as to how to react.
The first reaction isn't the best. This is the one where you would just love to let rip. Stand up if you're sitting down, look the idiot in the face who has annoyed you and then blast them with the full double barrels of wrath. The ugly thing which is kept held down under a big stone. The one which somehow starts to get dislodged. Especially in times of stress. Where you have contained yourself too much as it is throughout the entire day and this minute now you can't contain it any longer. The thing is though, once the genie is let out of the bottle there is no turning back, you get a bad name for yourself. If you're a boss it might not matter too much but it's the little fishes who get upset. They can't take seeing the boss lose it. You could get reported. And of course it does take a truly crazy person to let the fog horn of WRATH out. Even if the individual you are talking to is a complete idiot. So it was today when I had an email sent to me which jumped up and down inside me, I wanted to walk over to the person who sent it and say in a loud emphatic voice "you're sacked." Of course I didn't. Instead, I did the best next thing and went to lunch. Pretended I had not seen the email and thought I can not tackle this now, it will have to wait until those little festering things called emotions have calmed down. I'll tackle it later and I'll reason it and then I'll be calm and collected in it. Temporarily ignoring the event was the best way to deal with it.
So it was in the afternoon, after lunch, a not very hot pasty followed by coffee, I took the object of my not to be desired passion and dealt with it. Keeping a cool calm head like James Bond in the middle of a very sticky wicket. The bady has got the upper hand, but Bond's cool exterior doesn't let anything away. In a much calmer frame of mind I chatted to the individual who had sent the email, I tackled the subject of the email and what their concerns were. I didn't mention anything about how I felt because it was nothing to do with me, but I did put it in as neutral a term as possible it was their job and they had to get on with what they had been asked to do. Like a slippery fish the individual I conversed with changed subject, ducked and dived, hid behind a rock, threw a stone and again tried to joust with the hidden devil of WRATH inside. What they didn't know was even a cold pasty is able to put a good tight lid ontop of this sneaky bad tempered old man. It worked wonders. Afterwards I laughed to myself, the whole thing was really just a mole hill aspiring to be a mountain. It was then at this point I thought of the burn you get from exercise. The point at which every effort is pushed and tried until practical physical exhaustion, then it is done again on another day. But this time the level at which the burn happens is higher. I'd now tested Mr WRATH to a level he has been and knows it doesn't work. Push me further again and I'll be able to deal with it. In the end it was actually funny, as I said, it's funny being a human being.
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