I got a Ukulele

It has been more than a year since deciding I wanted to play the Ukulele and this Chrimbo the dream has come true. Sparkling after many hints, over several months did what she had to do, got me a beautiful black soprano ukulele. The Uke is going to be called Bertha, she is small, she is black and she is beautiful. Sparkling said I'd make love to her if I could. My response was no it's a Ukulele. I'm an older fat man now and I have never played an instrument in my life, but now I will. I chose the easiest thing I could, it's easy because it only has four strings to it, so shouldn't be so difficult to learn the chords. It is small though, and getting your fingers in the right position around the neck is not an easy thing to do. I didn't realise how much finger tips get such a bashing either. They are so sore, it's like pressing down on a cheese wire. They are sore, numb and probably starting to get tough with callouses. Bertha came with a small tuner, it's great, I just clip it on, turn the knobs at the top and they tighten the strings or loosen them. The tighter the higher the tone. The strings have to be re-tuned every time I pick it up and play it. But I so love the sound it makes.  Bertha has a beautiful intonation. I've been spending time with Bertha every day now and we are getting quite acquainted. Last night Sparkling endured many hours but was very good and content while she played Candy Crush, it hardly effected her concentration at all. She must be getting to like the sound as well. It's one of those things which grow on you. Mind I think listening to any live music is a better experience than piped. It's now just a matter of learning to use Bertha.

There are many things to think about when learning Ukulele, things I could not of considered if I didn't have it. One, of which must be the strumming pattern. It's not just an up and a down strum, it is patterned, just as the timing of the strum is. To an extent many beginners tutorials indicate strumming is everything, this is followed by chords. Keeping time over a period of time, well, I mean at least four minutes and also being able to change chord isn't easy. It's taking a lot of practice, and if I hadn't of cut my finger today I'd of put in more time. They say white men don't have rhythm and they, (whoever they are) are probably right. If the strumming wasn't difficult enough to keep, changing from one chord to another is just as hard.  It's a matter of both remembering where to put the fingers and then doing it as smoothly as possible. Doing it without looking is a hell of an achievement, you have to feel the way and in all reality it's almost like being blindfolded. In a sense this reminds me of when I used to do photography, learning your camera so it could be worked in the dark is essential. I've decided to learn how to play "somewhere over the rainbow."  Which gives an opportunity to learn several chords and to play a sequence of them. Remembering the sequence of notes is another thing, and I haven't even considered reading music, which for now is a matter of writing letters on a piece of paper. The dots on lines will have to wait, I wana produce sweet music. Or at least a version of some kind of music, which can be recognised. We shall see.

There have been a lot of comments made, many comparing me to George Formby. The shame is I can't play the bloody thing and am just learning. I'm sure if I was able to give everyone the finished product of a song on the Ukulele, when it's in tune, the right chords, strummed to time and not forgotten they'd all be impressed. I've seen what can be done with a Uke on Youtube and it's amazing. A Uke can sing and has a beautiful voice, but perhaps it's all a matter of taste. It could be too much with Chrimbo Turkey, Chrimbo pud, Chrimbo bits and pieces which has effected minds. Or it could be the Uke is seen as a not serious instrument, a fun thing which you'd give to a child to play with. But it is necessary to start from somewhere, there has to be a beginning and I can't think of a better beginning than this. Yes it is a fun instrument, but it has a serious side. I like fun things but maybe am not so happy with being made fun of when this passion for the Uke has been stewing for such a time. I'm so happy Sparkling has been really helpful and supportive even though she must be at a stage of pulling her hair out and smashing Bertha over my head. L & B man said he would, and that was only only after about an hour, Sparkling has endured many hours. I'm sure Rock wanted to make me wear it as a hat as well, but Sparkling is still enduring. I wonder if she is upping her does of prescription chill pills. Could be, but I wont ask, she always seems so happy.