Monday, April 06, 2009

Grand National loss and an atheisitc dilemma

The Grand National was on Saturday. The same day I had mate problems, but it didn't stop me from having a little flutter. I got home early and was able to watch it on the box. One of the horses I bet on was Stan, it was a tip from Sparkling but she did warn me saying it probably had 3 legs. When I turned the TV on the odds had changed from a few hours earlier. It had dropped from 100-1 to 50-1. One of the bookies said the punters were betting on everything, it was unpredictable. However, to his chagrin he made a prediction whoever the winner was going to be it would not be anything at 100-1. He got it so very wrong.

I realised this the moment there was a false start. I thought to myself this means the horses on long odds will have a better chance. Unfortunately at this moment I could barely run to the bookies and put another bet on. The start is an important part of a race, and all the good horses would have burnt themselves out a little by jostling for places and getting a good head start only to find it was to no avail. As I watched the race unfold another year passed and a few minutes later, not a single one of the 3 horses I bet on came in. I wouldn't mind I had also bet on a favourite. The winner was Mon mone, at 100-1; inside I was withering wrong again, another loss. Well it will probably be a year before I bet again. I hope so. I can't believe my luck.

Last night with some free time on my hands I checked out atheist groups. Although I am agnostic as more time passes I find myself tending towards the argument against belief. Especially because Dawin's theory of Natural Selection just is so credible. A simple but brilliant idea and a complete shift in thought at the time. Darwin by the way was a naturalist as a hobby rather than a vocation, his life was going to be planned out as a minister. It's odd how it went the other direction, but incredible.

Going back to atheism. I checked out some web sites to try and find if there was a group near to where I live. Nothing seemed local to me, but there were some things going on in central London. One of which was a talk happening at a hall. It looked pretty interesting. It was about women and their role in Islam. By a controversial ex Muslim woman I'm sure I had seen her talking on TV. I pondered on booking a seat which is in a couple of weeks time, only to find the event is sponsored by a gay and lesbian group. Which has kind of put me off going. For a couple of reasons. Firstly I have to ask does this mean I have to be gay to be able to go to the talk? Secondly, I don't want to be gay and or picked up because someone thinks I am gay. I then wondered about bringing along my older nephew. But another thought occurred to me, if I bought him along would this mean I'd be looked on as an older man with a young bit off stuff boyfriend. The whole thing now has got out of hand, going is a dilemma. I'm not gay, I don't want to be picked up and I don't want to be thought of as gay. Even being an atheist seems difficult in these circumstances. I can hear L & B man saying right now something unpleasant, and using a not very nice phrase.

Anyway I've revealed to Sparkling how I suddenly found myself out walking and talking to myself. Maybe I'm not as normal as I hoped I was. Decisions, decisions.

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