Monday, April 11, 2011

What has Big Momma eaten?

Big Momma's diabetes has been playing up.  Or rather this is a result of her diet.  Waking up five or six times at night to visit the toilet for a tinkle. It is killing me.  I am exhausted in the morning from it all.  So it was a matter of trying to find out what she has been eating.  When asked if it was sweets she would say "no I've not had any," I then asked about chocolate biscuits, she shakes her head and emphatically again says "no, I've not had any of them either" as if to say she is completely innocent and nothing of harm has passed her lips.  Although there just happened to of been a half empty packet of honey covered peanuts she had yesterday.  I know it was half empty because I had the other half. Trying to find out what she has eaten is a guessing game.  It is likely been narrowed down to a bar of chocolate she was given yesterday, bananas which I am sure are not good for diabetics and possibly sultana's, which are middle on the Glycemic Index (GI).  But there must of been something else, I believe she is not telling the whole story and I don't know how to fathom it out what she has been putting down he cake hole, literally speaking.  I even asked her about cakes and yes, she said no to them as well.  Well this evening I went to the gym and if after a disturbed night of intermittent sleep and a work out at the gym I don't sleep then I'll just be unhappy.  Very unhappy.  While Bog Momma laughs her little head away and most likely catches up with the rest of her sleep in the afternoon while watching the box.  I sure hope she hasn't gone back to eating crisps and chocolate in the afternoons again.  I'm struggling now to keep my eyes open and it's only just gone 9:30 p.m.

She is clearly potty.  Then so is the Japanese inventor Dr. Nakamatsu, who has over 3000 patents in the Japanese patent office.  An example of his work is a holder for your mobile phone.  This is strapped to the wrist because he says carrying a mobile phone in a jacket pocket is bad for the heart.  I know this is not true.  It is actually using a mobile phone which is bad for the brain because of the microwaves.  However, Dr. Nakamtsu hasn't taken this into account.  I know as I've just spent or was it wasted an hour of my life watching a documentary on him from 4oD.  Yet, this gentleman is a shrewed business man.  He would not sell off his water assisted powered bicycle people carrier, because the person who asked for it was trying to get it at half price.  Well like all shrewed business men his hand is not on his heart it's welded to his wallet.  Dr. N is now 80 years old and plans to live to the age of 144 years.  He has taken photographs of every meal he has eaten for the last 34 years and then does an analysis on his blood.  Checking to see if his blood is particularly healthy after certain meals some days later.  He has even received a Nobel Prize.  No I got it wrong.  It was an Ig Nobel Prize (as in ignoble), which he collected.  In my view although a prestigious inventor his unique abilities also border on the crack pot.  Except for the fact he invented the floppy disk drive,but I've just checked Google and Wikipedia says it was IBM, now one of them must be telling a fib.

I wonder if Dr Nakamatsu would like to meet Big Momma? Now there's an interesting thought.

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