Bathroom scales

There was two things I had in mind to do this lunch time, one to buy some ear phones the other to get a set of bathroom scales. My shock from the dubious weigh-in at gym had got me to thinking. So at lunch time I went to Argos to get the scales. Nothing fancy I thought, because last time I got electronic ones which took a battery. After a year the battery ran out, then even with a new battery it failed to work. So I chose mechanical ones. Greener as well, not to mention cheaper in the long term.

Argos was a challenge at lunch time because of the shoppers just standing about waiting for their items whilst I was on a lunch break and each second ticking by was my lunch evaporated. The man behind the counter advised each customer after giving them their goods to check out the Argos web site. I heard it so many times, if he said it to me I was going to tell him I didn't have a computer. Not to mention give him a piece of my mind, considering how many people had pushed in front of me. Their queuing system is ridiculous. It's just pure luck. Unfortunately there was a big fat woman who was in front of where I should of been queuing and doing nothing, standing there with a vacant look. She was waiting for additional items when they had not turned up with her order. While I stood there with my ticket and a single item just fuming away, becoming very, very annoyed. My face must of shown it. I said nothing when my ticket was eventually taken and I was given the scales, the daggers of annoyance were in my eyes. I could of clobbered this man, even though I tried to keep it in my mind it wasn't his fault.

Being aware the result of a new weigh-in might not be so good probably didn't help. When I got back to the Fish Factory to put my flippers on the scales, I didn't overdo my lunch requirements. As if for some reason having a smaller lunch today would make my mass a little less. Just a single sandwich and a weight watchers yogurt from the fridge. Which I must say has a weird after taste; how people can eat weight watchers foods I don't know. I will not get them again. Only two more yogurts left for the next couple of days. For some reason they taste powdery, and the last think I need is additional carbohydrates.

Out of the box came the scales. I planted my feet on them and watched the needle swing. Then to my disappointment the realisation I was now an even fatter man came over me. I still didn't want to believe the scales, and even now part of me doesn't believe them, but they are new. They can not be wrong. I am heavier than I have ever been and it's going to take some time to shed what I've got. An imaged of a heart came to me from a recent advert on TV by the British Heart Foundation. It pumps away in the middle of the screen with an edging of fat at the top while statistics are spoken about heart disease. It's not good news. It's bad news. So when I went out tonight I took with me the four chocolate ripple bars I'd got cheap from Sainsburys and gave them to Little Monster Boy's mum. Not as a present, but because I'd eaten three bars yesterday and thought no wonder belly has now got me. Thing is I just like food it would be so much easier if I didn't. Don't matter, tomorrow is another day, I'll do a little extra at the gym and lay off crisps amongst other rather naughty food stuffs.

The world needs an important invention and I know what it is, the chocolate lettuce, with zero calories but great taste. OK any aspiring inventors out there?