I forgot how to tie a knot - a tie knot

This is something I have to do about five days in the week, it is done almost automatically, like breathing.  This morning I forgot how to knot my tie.  I was nearly all ready to leave the house, slipped the mauve tie around my shirt collar and began.  For some unknown reason I started counting.  It was the number of times I went up and round, it began "1, 2,....what's wrong here?"  OK then I took another attempt, counted one hesitated and continued.  The tie ended up way too long and I couldn't understand what happened.  So I untied the knot and tried again.  I would of been flabbergasted at my own inability to do this simple task had I thought about it, but I just couldn't think any more because I was thinking about doing up my tie.  Imagine reaching for you shoe lace and just somehow getting lost or bewildered your fingers haven't done the job.  Now I know in the notion of Zen there is something called beginners mind.  It's a tantalising grasp which comes in the early stages of meditation and gives you an incite into what you are trying to achieve.  However, once this has happened it disappears and then takes years to recapture the same moment.  Either that or a lot of head shaving and wearing a orange robe.  My tie knotting ability had gone. Like it had been sapped out of me by some insect instead of taking blood it had taken knowledge.  Knowledge the most valuable thing in the world.  More so when it's my own.  I just so hope I don't have mad cow's disease.  Better lay of the burgers.

Talking about burgers I had a lovely portion of garlic vegetables on rice today.  It was delicious.  Very nice.  I also went to the gym.  Then got home and found out all the biscuits had gone.  A bit like my tie experience, except these had actually vanished into thin air.  Which is the thing with exercising, it just makes you want to eat more.  It's a vicious circle.  I exercise to get fit and lose weight.  I get fitter eat more but lose no weight.  As the biscuits had been vanquished there was no other recourse but to try a bit of old Madeira cake.  It was dry and tough.  Well just maybe if I carry on like this, there will come a day when I forget my appetite and eat less rather than eat so much my tummy feels like it wants to burst.  It's unhealthy I know.  I'm doing my best to fight it.  But of all things temptation and losing ones marbles can't be helped.  Better do a knot in my handkerchief in order to remember.  here's hoping I remember how to do the knot.