Stung by a wasp

I got stung the other evening. By a wasp. I don't think it was impressed with me. The thing is wasps have their own mind set, they are obstinate litter critters, and don't like people, especially those who tend too close to their nest. Or as in my case, cut down a bush they happen to use to sit on while not annoying other insects, or admiring the sun go down. The bush had to be trimmed. I needed to put a ladder there. On account of an ongoing summer painting festival. Yes it was the turn of a front fascia board. I could of reasoned with the wasp but I think it was pretty pissed off. It was odd. For I heard this annoying buzzing sound. I'm sure it had landed on my shoulder or was trying to get in my ear. Then the thought of it crawling inside my ear created a little panic. I'll admit it, just a little one. I waved about like a lunatic on amphetamines, hearing but not seeing the bloody thing. Thinking then it had disappeared when it had not. The wind was pretty strong so it must of had a problem maneuvering about. This did not stop it though from seeking vengeance. It landed on my arm. Then stung, it was like a pin prick "ouch" I said. I saw the little red mark pulled it to my lips and sucked hard on it, just in case it was anything like a poisonous snake bite. Like there are poisonous snakes in this part of London. As a precaution I then spat out the sucked out poison or sting or whatever it was. Now I was annoyed, the little shit had stung me, and I'm sure it felt the same way about the bush being cut down, with the wasp equivalent of the big human shit has cut his bush down.

It was then I wondered whether I would go into anaphylactic shock. Whether my body would not cope with the sting and only just find out I was allergic to wasp stings. However, nothing happened. No blowned up tongue, swollen arm or delirious meanderings, my body coped with it quite well. Just a little red rash and only me knowing it was a sting. Later on when speaking to Sparkling she told me it would take about 8 hours to the shock came on. I knew this to be untrue and was quite confident when I woke up in the morning I'd be the same as ever. I was. The same as ever, except for having aged another day and wary of wasps. I also wondered if wasps have honey and what their role is in the animal world, besides stinging ordinary blokes who like to do a bit of painting now and again.

Zombies and nuts

Today has been a free day, mostly spent this morning just wondering who I could chat to, because I think I'm going crazy. The one friend I got left wasn't answering his phone and he may not see himself as a friend anymore. I even considered ringing up the Samaritans, I pulled up their web site and checked out the number. Then later on I checked out the requirements of becoming a clinical psychologist and wondered if I should put in an application, unless I'm too old, which probably would be the case. But you never know. So I just sat for hours or so it seemed, with this state of mind I could not shift, it's the pissed off state. You know the one. Where any little thing just gets to piss you off, but disproportionately so. When it seems I only got one reaction which is raging bull. After an afternoon of catch up TV on the Internet I'm now sufficiently zombied out of my head to care or do anything. But for a desire to drink some ice cold buds. I got a six pack which should see me till I fall asleep even if there is hardly enough alcohol in them to get you drunk they will do nicely for now.

I now know why we have family. It's simple; because if you are pissed off with the world then you still have someone left to moan at. Unfortunately if your family is crazier than you then it's a problem. Hell, there's hardly any sane people left in this world. This bud is delicious, it's my second and helps with the writing. The toughest thing though is realising once you've reached a level of maturity you are more possessed of intelligence than any other member of your family, which is a right bummer. It would be so fecking good to chat to someone who isn't so fecked up you don't know if they just came out of an insane asylum. The insane can not cure the insane. They just get worse. And if you're on the edge of insanity, well it speaks for itself, talk to a nutcase then you become one. Or you might not, if you realise they are nuts and it somehow puts you back into real life sanity. I was reading on a web site some stuff, it said three in ten people will go nuts each year. I use the word "nuts" in a broad terms to mean any mental illness at all. And with great respect to the nuts, and affection so don't take it any other way. Just I wonder if I am going nuts. Then I wonder if there is anything I can do about it, even religion, or meditation, but I'm so angry I can't meditate about anything. Only the buds is helping at the moment. Hell, don't you think a bud bottle is a beautiful sight, unless of course you got a tall black pint of Guinness, which is even more beautiful.

I'm feeling chilled now. Think I'll go and get another bud, just to make sure. Problem is they go down way too fast. Should of got 12.

Dirty rotten swines

I been listening to the freephone telephone lines about Swine Flu. They seemed to repeat the scary word Pandemic, and of course the information I wanted to get I couldn't. Just a recording which went round and round. Although in quite a clear English voice and not the usual alternate country third part switchboard. Where the person who answers the phone calls themselves a typical British name but has an accent no typical British person can understand. So there's very little info out there, except it's milder than was first expected. Which is good especially as it seems the Parliament have made a Sours ear out of the entire pandemic process. Getting flu jabs, giving out information and telling us what's going on, are all just a little bit on the late side. So the short of it is I still don't know what is going on or where I stand, or will probably fall down later on the whole scenario. But I can't help being somewhat concerned.

There reason for this concern is yet another person at the Fish Factory has reported their child has the Swine Flu. But as if this was not bad enough they are in the factory (not the child, the parent) doing their usual work as if nothing has changed. OK they may look like they are not ill, but they could be carrying the virus and it has not yet blown up to full blown Swine Flu. Which means any unlucky person who happens to sit in their vicinity while chopping up fish could also end up with Porky Flu. The reality is workplaces do not know what to do, and as all the Children in England are now on their Summer holidays, it's as good a time as any for the whole country to go down snorting. I'll do my best not to gorge myself on the experience, but it's contagious and the clock is now ticking faster than it was a few days ago. Like some phantom trotter has over wound the coil. Some people are just right pigs over these things. Personally I do my best not to stick my snout in other peoples businesses, but it's not appropriate for them to stick theirs in my trough.

As I am constantly being told by L & B man, "get over it" so I will, but I'll do my best not to let anyone eat my eggs and bacon, if I can help it.

photo booth

For the past few days I been wondering where I can get a photo of myself for a photo card. This is because I've found it is cheaper to purchase a monthly train ticket than buying tickets each day. The saving is impressive at about six to seven pounds in a single week. However, as I been unable to find a picture of myself which just goes to show how not vain I am, the only alternative was to buy one from a photo booth machine. Which is what I did at lunch time. I made my own sandwiches as well so as to cut down on this lunch periods expenses. The first machine I went to was actually at the train station, but when I sat on the stool I then noticed a sign saying it was out of order. Great. Ten minutes later I had walked to another shop where the machine worked.

At first the stool was too high. This meant the photo would of been a great nose and mouth but chopped off my eyes and head. The seat needed a few spins to lower it during which I thought there must of been kids inside doing exactly the same thing. I put my coins in the machine and followed the options step by step. It did want me to remove my specs but being a rebel I said no and kept them on, if I had taken them off I wouldn't of been able to read the rest of the instructions. Which I could imagine would of eventually set of the flash while my head was pushed close to the window looking in and squinting. I don't think there's a great deal of photo cards which require tops of head pictures, especially ones where it might show a gradual thinning out of hair. No. Specs on it was. Being in a rush meant I didn't have much time to see what was the best picture I should take, so I just took one picture and accepted it immediately. Within thirty seconds I had 4 just printed portraits. They didn't really flatter my appearance at all, my lips looked thin, and it seems I have a small but prominent frown line between the eyes. Not to mention looking old. Even though I'm young on the inside, the reality of an old looking picture is depressing. I should of kept my baseball cap on it might of helped.

So now I have the pictures in my wallet and tomorrow morning I expect I'll get a photo card and advanced travel ticket. Then I wont have to worry or stress about the slow ticket sellers or the crowds in front of me while I wait for the next customer. Or the automatic ticket machines which love to just reject my coins when the train is coming into the station. Overall, getting these pictures might be the smartest thing I've done in ages. Bad luck they don't have my best side. Next time I'll moony, after all no one really looks at those things.

Book, chinese and boring food

I got a book sent of to Sparkling and she received it today. It's Richard Bolles latest edition of What Color is your parachute. Sparkling said she was going to kill me if it gave advice on how to complete a CV. After an Internet spat we had in which I was the bad guy and really wasn't putting myself out, not to mention a couple of days of the quiet treatment to show me I was the bad man who didn't help. Anyway, with a little bit of luck the book has gone down OK. It is one of those essential books which help people to find new carriers or jobs in the right way. By getting them to look at their skills, their abilities and their aspirations and to make the reader think in a different way. Bolles says people who had read his book just appear to fall into the right job. Although I suppose in today's recession it may not be as instant as you'd like it to be. If only people could get jobs just on CVs, which Bolles says is the worse way to get a job and has calculated the odds of a job from a CV at about 14,000 to 1. It's a shocking fact.

Gym was hard work today. So much again I nearly walked out but managed to keep on running, then stopping, then running. It has to be made a habit, good habits are better than bad habits and after yesterday's lazy PJ day I need more good habits. One person at the fish factory who has gone on a diet goes to the gym 7 days a week, and eats very little in the way of food. I must eat food, it's just the quantities I have to reduce, and the poor diet. Maybe I shouldn't of done the Chinese at lunch. My intention was just to get a sandwich, but somehow I ended up ordering a chicken in black bean sauce on crispy noodles. It was very nice. I'm sure it had a lot more calories than the sandwich would of possessed. Then sandwiches are never really as exciting. It's a matter of getting used to boring food. Blimey, some things in life are very difficult.

Peanuts

It's been a lazy day today, I just couldn't help myself. Even wore my PJs till one p.m., I was being entertained by Terminator the first movie. When you look at old movies you thought were cool at the time they can some how look dated. Then it's hard to maintain attention and whatever special appeal they had seems not so special. The music was electronic and pitiful, the special effects just didn't hack it, especially when the Terminator killed people. They just hit the ground and slumped in an instant death. Very convenient. Mind he was a robot and I suppose this means he never missed. But then how many ticket machines have you ever used and found to be reliable, not many. Not many at all.

After receiving a text from Sparkling I managed to get in a five minute chat. Well, it's nice to talk once in a while. Even if I am laughed at for being so grateful to be able to chat to her. Maybe it's because I'm nuts. Which reminds me of a story I heard today and made me think someone was so nuts they were likely to be rejected from a fruit and nut cake. It happens. Fish factory tomorrow and back to the grindstone.

How to get rich quick - guaranteed

It is miraculous how people who have made millions then go on to sell their books to millions of other people so they can make even more money. With it comes a guarantee, someone is going to be rich and it usually isn't the individual who buys into the scheme. If something looks too good, smells too good, moves too good then the likelihood is, the something is not what it appears to be. Every sensible adult in the world should know it. There lecture over, now with luck I've had a few extra people log onto and view my blog and viola! No I don't get rich but the counter clicks up a couple of more views. Brilliant, thanks to all those people who thought I had the secret to getting rich quick. Of course I do. But because it is a secret I am not going to give it out in this blog, I have to give it out to each person on a one to one basis. But first send me a comment and then we can arrange a small fee. I accept pay pal and all major credit cards. My word is my bond. My bond is my word, and with this here dictionary I place my solemn hand on there are many words I got.

I've spent the usual sixth day passing my life away, but for some reason the Fish Factory seemed a bit more pleasant than usual. Sparkling made me laugh when she sent me a short text about her latest silk sheets. Apparently she didn't get much of a sleep on account of the duvet, pillows, etc slipping off the bed. I'm sure they must of felt good on her skin, unfortunately as the weather has changed from hot to cooler now the need of a duvet is greater. When I arrived home Silly Sophia, Little Monster Boy and the Box Maker were here. The kids have just began their summer holiday which lasts a full six weeks. Just as it begins to rain more and the days become two minutes shorter. Little Monster boy has managed to squirm his way into having this week off because of a phantom illness. It seems to come and go just as he was about to head for school in the morning. We watched the TV together and some program called "Dine with me" in which one of the contestants made a sours ear of a pavlova. I advised Little Monster Boy of how one day I was feeling really ill and woke up to find my foot had broken. I elaborated just a little bit so as to plant the seed. I'm going to see now what happens over the next week or so, I wonder if he uses this excuse. As there's no more school left he might save it up for another occasion, but I'll play on it again, watch this space.

I feel happy, I have no explanation for it, it's just there, just happened. It must be the falling off the wagon scenario. I've fallen a little more today, but hope to pick myself up tomorrow, even though I've done no exercise to counteract this small glitch. I'll just have to catch up with myself next week. Hopefully I wont break a leg, or foot in the meantime. Or come to think of it, catch the Swine flu. The thing with this flu is although there are about 10,000 confirmed cases, I been hearing so many instances of people and children especially getting it, I doubt very much this is a true figure. I'd say it was ten times this figure. Lets face it GPs are not going to spend their budget actually putting every person who says they have it through the tests. Which would mean a swab and possibly a blood sample. No way! Much too expensive. So, it makes reasonable sense to disbelieve any official figures. The pandemic is here and it's only a matter of time. I heard someone say years ago there used to be "pox" parties. These were parties where anyone with chicken pox would invite all the other children over so they could catch it as well. This way it would be controlled, they could get it before going on holiday and it would all be cleared up. The news this evening has just gave an article on school children who had went to China for their holiday. Only to be put into quarantine because they have Swine Flu. Typical. Our Great British export is now a virus, so much for British quality workmanship, or workwomanship as the case may be. Funny how my foot seems to be aching at the moment.

Falling off the wagon, make sure it's not far then

This blog is short because I've just posted one on my other blog, see "irritating things, places, people and events" (http://irritatingthingspeopleplacesevents.blogspot.com/) it's good, I enjoyed writing it. To do with getting off a train. Go read it now, I mean it, it's good. You'll laugh as well, I hope.

Well it's Friday and there is something quite wonderful about reaching a Friday. Although tomorrow is longer at the Fish Factory, for some reason the entire day is more relaxed. It's quieter with fewer people around and so more work can be done. If the weather holds off I'll promise myself a walk home which takes an hour to do and very good health wise. Which I have to probably do, because today I think I fell off the wagon on the health front kick. Yep had a nice Chinese meal then when I got to the gym my belly fell so large I had to give up running on the running machine and walk instead. It was just so hot and stuffy in there, my t-shirt got all sweaty. Then I sat on a weight machine, to pump some iron, pulled the weights down in two repetitions and stopped. Just completely refused to do any more. I sat there staring into infinity, something had a hold of me. I was unable to more or do anything, just sitting there was the only thing I could do. I allowed myself time to enjoy the seat then realised the next best thing to do was leave and hit the showers. After gym I went to the shops, got some bits, a bag of almonds in a jalepeno dusting and a large bag of crisps, oops nearly forgot the malt bread. Unfortunately I been stuffing my face since. I accept it's just a glitch and these things do occasionally happen, even to the best of us. So I shouldn't expect to lose a great deal when I next get on the scales. But it's OK, it's just a glitch. These things happen. You just have to keep on trying. If you fall of your bike you get back on. Although if you fell from a 13 storey tower block you'd be unlikely to get back onto much at all. But health wise it's just a tad different.

I had a horror story yesterday morning while shaving. Spied another grey hair, in fact I think I am gradually going grey. Gradually getting older. Salt and peppered, some call it the George Cluney look, personally I think it's just grey old age doing it's ever slow and incessant thing. The creeping up thing. No wonder I fell off the wagon this evening, I needed to comfort the inner feelings of aging and a defunct life of drooling, watching TV on high volume and wishing I was young again. Bollocks, feck the wagon I need a wagon wheel.

Rain

The weather forecaster predicted rain today, but it has been beautiful and sunny the whole day. Except for this evening. Now it is raining, as though magic clouds have come from nowhere at all. The rain is heavy, the bucket type where just a moment outside wets you through. It doesn't end there for bright white sparks of lightening blank the sky like a giant flash bulb. It's stormy, wet, and still humid. Can't get away from it.

The telly is on the blink. Something to do with the satelite dish not picking up a signal. I wouldn't mind it was in the middle of an episode of the Mentalist and I was enjoying it. Sometimes things just don't work. Just like Sparkling is giving me the cold shoulder. Well I suppose it could get worse I might have swine flu. Oink, Oink. Well I probably will, seeing as I just seen Silly Sophia who said she was talking to her friend who's son has it. Her friend wasn't well, but the son had been given a dose of the flu medicine. It's probably one of the worse things which could happen now, if I get it, I'll be knocked out for a week on account of an underlying asthma. It always does it. Mind given I been going to the gym hopefully my lungs will be more able to cope with the strain. Heck, I better start writing my will. I wonder who I can leave my very few possessions to? Maybe some Swine Flu research trust, or even better a satellite dish research trust. Then of course there's always Sparkling, then I expect she'll wish she had talked to me and feel guilty. But it would be to late. Yes too bloody late.

I'll shake my head, throw a dice and wonder what it means, at least it's a lot easier guessing the roll of a dice than what goes on in a woman's head. It's so odd how on the occasion a number of wet days all come together at the same time. Bloody good I got an umbrella and a smile on my face then.

So many loco people

In order to continue a health bent and weight loss program I walked home today. It's just over two miles and took about an hour to do. Which isn't too bad, but to tell the truth it was to counteract the fact I'd eaten a Singapore fried rice for lunch and felt guilty. I'll not mention the soft drink or chocolate afterwards. Fortunately I didn't eat a bag of dry roasted peanuts, well you have to have a limit sometimes. Although others don't.

After yomping all the way I opened the door to be greeted by door big moma on the phone talking to the cinema. She had decided to book tickets for the new Harry Potter movie about to come out on Wednesday and was enthusiastic about taking Monster Boy and Silly Sophia to see it. I caught the tale end of the conversation, the part where voice on the other end of the phone asks for your credit card details. However, she kept interrupting this process and told them she did not have a credit card. She repeated this a couple of times got annoyed and then the phone was then put down. She looked at Silly Sophia and said she couldn't book the ticket.. Sophia asked if it was an automatic machine moma spoke to, moma said it was a man's voice on the end. Then just for good measure as though no one had heard her conversation and she didn't have a credit card. Funny I thought because, I'm sure they got rid of the human operators some years ago. Well it transpired the voice was a machine as I had thought. The tickets weren't booked. The machine or man's voice had said bookings up to Sunday were only being taken. Now Silly Sophia took this to mean Potter would only be on at the cinema for a few days. It was then I had to ask her whether she was nuts. I pushed the envelope and questioned her how long the last HP movie had been on at the cinema. Somehow the penny dropped and the realisation the voice on the end of the phone had got it wrong. At this decisive point I wondered I had just walked into a fruit and nut cake factory.

Tweedledum the twin to Tweedledee at the Fish Factory likes to be right in everything he says. The thing is I don't think I have met a more ignorant individual. But it doesn't stop him from finding out anally retentive facts and spurting them off like he knows best. He just thinks he does but doesn't. This afternoon I stated the most technologically advanced culture was Japan. He in response said technology had been around since he was a kid and then tried to say he'd been interested in it all the time. But Tweedledum didn't really understand what I said. He tried and bring other people into the conversation, shooting his mouth off and still not discussing the statement. He was avoiding the statement and not using reasoning or discursive argument, which is his preferred method. I am now of mind I am surrounded by people who have been drinking loco weed contaminated water. Tweedledum is always like this and usually I just keep quite, as he went on I just did my usual and shut up letting him talk gibberish. Maybe it's the sound of his own voice or he's been eating nuts as well. Oh yes, must of been the packed I had opted to miss.

Smell of lemon, hmmm nice

I did something I don't usually do when I hit the gym, I went to the loo, which wasn't unusual, but then I lifted up my t-shirt to see the belly. It was then realisation hit me why I weigh so much, it's not on the hips, lips or tits, well maybe a little on my man boobs, but it is on the belly. A bloody big tractor tyre and I thought tractor tyres were out of fashion. Well they are not and not to far away there is a spare. Tyre or no tyre this did not stop a work out from being pursued. Though it did mean stopping four different times to get my breath and have a drink of water when on the fat man running machine. Me being fat, the machine being for running.

Today I bought a new man perfume from Body Shop called Kistna. It's got a nice fresh citrus like smell to it, but doesn't seem to last long. Tweedle Dee who sits next to me in the Fish Factory tried it out, it was OK he said, but then showed me his Channel man's perfume. It cost fifty quid, then he acknowledged it was an expensive air freshener. When wearing it in the car it drove the women wild, his eyes lit up at this confession. Sounds like he didn't get it for himself than more for his car or any females he gave a lift to. I can't say Kistna does the same, maybe it's just too much like a lemon. From which I guess lemons are not much of an attraction. Don't matter because the only person I want to keep attracting is Sparkling Eyes because she's gorgeous. Perhaps I'm tight, but fifty quid on a men's perfume seems a bit extravagant especially when there's other things it can go on.

It may not do much for my aroma but I did notice there was a rather large wasp flying about upstairs when I got home. It was going around in large slow circles. I thought it might of been something out of a Sci Fi film, about to grow bigger and bigger then to stab me with it's sting, while I was flicking a towel at it. All it needed to get antagonised. I opened a window, but being a rather slow wasp it rather just fly around, so it went into another room. I opened the window in the second room and after a while the buzzing noise stopped. Good, I thought it's found it's way out. Except it just decided to take a break and a kit kat and started up again, it's buzzing becoming more antagonising. I wondered what to do about this, and rather than just go mad and hit it hard with a paperback I had in my hand I stopped. I didn't really want to kill it. After all all animals have the gift of life and we should not do such things, even to insects, if it can be helped. Then I noticed a decorated bottle I had. I took the lid off, found the wasp eating it's tea, miniature crumpets and cream cakes, then slowly put the open bottle on top of the wasp. It buzzed about and was caught inside. Then with a little shake out of the window it went it's merry way although probably with indigestion after being disturbed at tea. I'm sure he liked my man perfume as well, but he didn't stay long enough to comment.

I hear Rock Chick returned today after a weekend of music at T in the Park. She had rung up Sparkling on Sunday and wanted to go home. It had been cold in the tent and she didn't get much sleep. Sparkling unfortunately was unable to drive to Rock Chick's rescue and told her she would have to stay see the final day's bands and the firework display. For three nights Rock Chick had slummed it in a field with 85,000 other visitors to the Park. Rock had spoken to Sparkling on the phone and said it wasn't funny, she must of detected a chuckle in Sparkling's voice. After all it was Sparkling who had done all the hard work and packed Rock Chick off, trying to adviser her of what would be needed. But no, she didn't take the word of her wise mum. Once home Rock was happy she had stayed, sun burnt and saying she was going to do the whole thing again next year. The thing is, had Sparkling actually gone to her rescue then Rock wouldn't of known how good the last day was going to be, or have the complete satisfaction to say she had done it. I suppose this really says sometimes people should not be rescued, a little discomfort never hurt anyone. Personally though, I think i would of preferred a bed to lay in and the option of a shower than walking around for 3 days stinking. Hmmm, I wonder if Rock would like to borrow my Kistna next time?

Monster's magic smile

I had a walk this afternoon with the ever so wise Monster Boy, who never fails to teach me a lesson in having fun and the beauty of a smile. Especially when that smile is predominated by a single large and out of place looking second tooth. Just as it is equally sad children do not stay children for long they are a privilege to be in the company of. To think our childhood years stay with us the rest of our life, more so than casting back recall to adult times.

On taking Monster Boy to the park I am somewhat at a disadvantage when he has his little scooter with him. This will mean he expends less energy than I do. It's good because it makes me inadvertently work out but it's bad if the Monster is still bouncing about like he's been on amphetamines for the last day or two. So to counter the laziness of him and his side kick set of wheels I ensure he has to walk on grass, gravel, dirt and hills. This means he has no choice but to carry his wheels about and in turn expend a little more energy. We can't always walk on grass but as long as there is a good mix of rough ground as well as pavement he gets more exercise. The wonderful thing was, he still wanted to go out and play than rather watch a superheros movie on TV. Which says something of the natural drugs he seems to have in his system.

In another incident this week big mama had to take him to school, he suddenly began to suffer from back pains and a headache. When mama then said she was suffering from a sore belly, hey presto, the Monster had a sore belly as well. With a bit of side stepping and nifty footwork mama took him to school and said the teacher would keep an eye on him in case he was ill. By some miracle, the back pain, belly pain and headache all cured themselves in seconds. He was in the company of a fellow school mate and was smiling. It's the smile again, there just has to be magic in it.

Run run run

This afternoon I had to run through gym like a whurl wind, Sparkling had put the thumb screws on because she had to watch Big Brother and T in the Park on the telly. And to chat to her would have to be before these programs were broadcast. I did it. Though only just. Did it. But I'm still fat so even though I sweated buckets it so far hasn't helped. My next weigh in will be Tuesday morning. I might be healthier, but I sure don't know if I've lost any weight. Then I did get to chat with Sparkling and she don't mind. I hope.

Where's the fire?

The alarm went off. It's an insistent ringing bell. There's no give up at all. I looked at my fellow fish monger sitting next to me. Neither of us knew for sure. Was this real or was it a drill? For a moment I thought it was real, but then there had been no drill in months. So it couldn't be. We took the stairs down and joined the cue. By the third floor it had began to get congested. The evacuees walked ever so slowly. If there were a panic, if this were real someone would of got hurt here. We had to check a lower floor so pealed off from the throng and noise of the crowd. Our job was just to make sure a fellow skilletter had got out, they needed additional help. We looked. Walked around and could not find them, they must of already left the building. In the meantime I had just joined the land of the not so healthy and probably not living. But it was just a drill. Outside we congregated in the gardens we're all supposed to meet. The sun was out, a nice breeze blew across our faces. It was just a drill, nothing to worry about.

I saw another fisherman his face was covered in flaking skin. Silly sod he'd been out a few days earlier when the sun was relentless and had no screen on. He had learnt his lesson. My legs have nearly stopped flaking from the fishing trip with L & B man. What will tomorrow hold?

I walked home, but for some reason I can't help eating. Had a plate of Singapore fried rice at lunch, it was spicy but not too spicy. Even going to the Fish Factory today I had walked half the distance the bus would of taken. With jacket off because I got hot. I need some more man perfume, something nice and in bulk, my last bottle of Body Shop own brand has finished. Something spicy perhaps? Or what about citrus like? Weekend is nearly here then overtime. So many fish to gut. It could be the heat, although rain is forecast, it's still hot. Nothing to get alarmed over though, I'm not on fire yet.

Earphones

I've got an MP3 player but share it between music and listening to the FM radio it has, it's only 2 Gigabyte but does me well and is about 2 or 3 years old now. However, although the button to switch it on is starting to stick there's not been much go wrong with it. Except for earphones. I don't know what it is but earphones just don't last that long. It must be something to do with the wires and they being under strain when pulled on. So my earphones have decided not to work properly, I can only hear in one ear and replacing them is a nightmare. It's not a matter of being tight but I don't think a replacement pair should cost more than ten quid at most. So checking out various shops, the ones on sale are either too expensive, or too cheap or too flimsy looking and probably wouldn't survive an hour with running about on various machines at the gym. I even looked on Amazon and am disappointed at their offering either. So having left work a half hour early I ran round the shops in search of earphones just before going to gym. Getting nowhere I was at my wits end, when I thought what about the pound shop? Just to tide me over for a few weeks till I an make a decision on which proper earphones to get, I bought them for a single pound. What a blooming bargain. OK they are flimsy and probably will not last long at all, however if these very stupid electronic shops want to keep over priced goods, they are going to lose custom. We are in a recession after all.

Odd things happen closer to home

I missed my train this morning by a few seconds. I ran into the station, requested my ticket from the office and waited what seemed minutes for the operator to print it out for me. I saw the train waiting there. As I got to the ticket barrier the doors closed. There was no way of getting on it now. I went through the barrier and saw it very slowly begin to trundle out of the station. Part of me wondered about running and jumping onto the back of it like James Bond. However, this idea was quickly abandoned I knew I would not be able to hang on and could be committing suicide by such a stupid act. The platform and seats were all empty so I had a choice of any chair I wanted. The next train was due in 15 minutes. Unfortunately it was then delayed by another 20 minutes. So began my day.

The other thing which happened to me was on the edge of bizarre, or maybe not. On the way over to see my little friend Monster boy and take him for a walk I was approached by a skinny short woman. She wanted me to help her. She said she had to pay her electric and was looking for business. This was in the middle of a road. I had just crossed half of the road and was now in the central reservation. She said she was looking for a fiver, and then pleaded even a tenner. So her price had actually gone up. The odd thing was I thought to myself. Business? Then for a moment "what business?" In the middle of a road and for a fiver, followed by a tenner, this was worse than missing my train. Doubly worse. She kept asking so I fished out a pound coin and gave it to her, not saying a word. Again the thought hit me, in the middle of the road? What? As soon as I have her the pound coin she said nothing else and just walked off, turning away to approach someone else if she could find anyone no doubt. I relayed the event to Sparkling. Her reply was along the lines of if she looked like Kylie then she would of been well set up on the street corner. Sparkling then asked if I got anything for the pound. I said I hadn't, and Sparkling asked "not even a willie feel?" my response was no of course. Also with the reply if she looked like Kylie I certainly wouldn't off, because Sparkling was all I needed in my life. Even though I did acknowledge Kylie is a good artist.

I walked with Monster Boy around the local park, and found there was a camera crew on location doing some filming, except there was no actors about. They had taken over a pub, the car park was full up and they had even screened off the car park with some quite large road vehicles. I saw flowers on the pavement around a fake shrine of RIP, and some wording on a wall denoting the pub being changed into a fictional community centre. All I could think was they were doing a TV play about a kid being killed in a community centre in London. I was a bit annoyed about this, partly because this is a possibility in this area, but hadn't happened. It was like they were tempting fate. Mind I suppose when you are approached by a prossy who doesn't look like Kylie and wants business in the middle of the road, there are quite a few possibilities to the area.

Hell, I could go on the game myself. Wonder if I really look like Hugh Jackman in these jeans or not. Maybe he doesn't have quite the same belly as me, then I don't really have the same hair as him, not forgetting muscles, height, etc. Otherwise I'm sure to be the spitting image.

Another window got dressed up

The window has got it's gloss on and now feels it has been dressed, as opposed to showing it's underwear, in the undercoat. Still more to do and other windows and facia's to paint. At this rate I'll be totally exhausted come the end of summer.

Look out window

It's my first day of overtime at the Fish Factory, I can't help the drained feeling. It's a matter of getting back into a routine and doing a six day week. Although I should count myself lucky in some countries people do a seven day week and work 18 hours just to provide textiles or training shoes for Western countries and spoilt children who have no conception of finance. Which likely counts for every person who lives in the Western world.

Tomorrow I shall be considering the gloss coat to an outside window. It's had two layers of undercoat and now at last for the top layer. I'm sure it will look great once it's on, I just hope the weather holds off for the time being and remains sunny. I'll even put on my working shorts and a t-shirt. With a little luck my coordination will come together and I'll not spill or drip too much paint. I plan to take the whole exercise very slowly and don't care if it takes me the entire day to complete. Professional builders, plumbers, labourers, electricians and decorators will all gripe at how DIYers do their stuff. However, I got to thinking today and maybe yesterday. If you are a home DIYer and are willing to spend time researching and putting the effort in it's possible to do as good or even a better job than some of the professionals. However, you need to have common sense, a little practice at some skills, and intelligence. With this and buckets of time, because this is really a big factor the DIYer has as opposed to the professional, there should be very few jobs which are not accomplish able. The real issue is getting the knowledge. But on very specialist things I wouldn't even try to have a go. Such as servicing a gas boiler. Whereas a lot of wood work, all decorating, plastering, most plumbing and probably even quite a bit of brick work can be done competently by the DIYer.

However, it does all depend on the individual. I know some people who manage to get up in the morning and get dressed who amaze me they can. Those kinds of people I'd think should probably have a health warning sticker attached. Some just have poor coordination and not much in the way of the common sense stuff. However, what I see as common sense not to do another person couldn't even conceive. Such as driving while on a mobile phone. Which really is in the realms of the true moron.

At this moment, Rock Chick's party will be in full swing. I wish I was there to help out and keep an eye on things. I was hoping it was going to take place on Rock's actual birthday so I'd be there. Rock is a responsible young lady, I can't say anything else for all the other teenagers and persons there because I don't know them. In the meantime Sparkling has to but her sensible head on and keep an eye on it. L & B man is expected to turn up so she'll have some company, he's a good man if there is one and he's it.

Yes, tomorrow me and a window have an appointment with destiny. Destiny by the way wears a glossy white coat.

I spy a spider

As I sit here writing I spy a spider on the ceiling, by the light. I wonder if he needs glasses? I'd say he looked as big as a tarantula but then I'd be exaggerating. He's just a house spider, but a meaty one. Which reminds me of having to retrieve a spider from Rock Chick's room. She had put a cup over it, but wouldn't slip a piece of paper underneath and then carry it out. I was asked to do this horror. Bloody thing refused to go on the paper as if it knew it was about to be forcibly evicted. Personally if the spider doesn't bother me I wont bother it. Hey I think he's waving.

It's been difficult getting to sleep lately, do you think spiders have had this problem as well? It's because of the heat, but today there has been a nice breeze and the sun didn't really come out and bare his glory until later this afternoon. The house is hot again this even at 27 degrees Celsius, a little cooler than the last few days. I hit the gym and was amazed at how few people there were present. Must be the good weather, where the pretty people prefer to go out and show their bodies. Alternatively they have more of a life on a Friday night than I do, which is probably true. It was hot there as well and I couldn't do a full work out. I watched some of the telly and caught the ending of Murry's match, he was so close and yet so far from winning a second set. I think his right arm isn't strong enough, he's got stamina but he just seemed to be losing his edge and couldn't figure out how to really beat his opponent. He needed to use his head or even meditate and see what happened. Mind he has done incredibly well and his Wimbledon was a hard slog he can be proud of; in fact there may be not other games as close or exciting as the one's he's had this time round.

Rock Chick has been preparing the house for her party tomorrow night. Sparkling has told me how Rock has been baking all day long and is now so tired she had to hit the hay early. I think she's getting some shut eye in so she can stay up as late as possible Saturday and into Sunday morning. She's been baking cakes, quite a lot by the sounds of it and getting her boyfriend Dangerous Sports lad to blow them up. I bet he was all puffed out from the exertion as well. However, most of the party goers are pretty good kids and have behaved themselves pretty well. Though I doubt if the party will end at midnight and expect it will go on to pretty late. I can't see otherwise. It will all depend on the flow of alcohol and how tipsy they all get. Puking is OK as long as they don't hog the pan all night long. But it's bound to be loud, as parties usually are, and the girls will have great fun doing a sing-along game thingy. They will probably wake up any spiders hiding in the closets because of the noise as well, I wonder if Rock has considered this?

Tomorrow I have to hit the Fish Factory early for overtime, considering I been getting up late every single morning this will be some feat if I can pull it off. At least it will be quite there without disruptive colleagues and if I concentrate I'll get a lot done. An 8 a.m. start on a Saturday, I must be mad. I must remember to make sandwiches and get myself well prepared early. For some reason I've found pineapple irresistible at lunch time. Especially the small tubs of mixed chopped fruit M&S sell. Sweet and delicious hmmm. Maybe it''s in line with the hot weather as well just ripening it off lovely. Seems like tomorrow is going to be a busy day for everyone. Hey the spider just waved again, I think he's trying to say something. Yes, looks like he's telling me he'll wake me up if I need some assistance. I just shook my head. Sandwiches, sandwiches, better get to work.

Polar bears to tea

The day ends hot again even with windows open the house is 28 Celsius. There seems to be little through draft so it's stifling. I put some cold water in the bath and sink hoping it would absorb some of the heat from the house, generally water is cooler than air, so now wonder if it is working. I hear plants are good as well for cooling a house, as is being in a house near the Antarctic but I doubt if there are many of them on account of the bears. Big white ones, apparently although they have wonderful thick coats they do like to pop around for tea and crumpets and unless you have reinforced the furniture. On account of polar bears being the world's number one disbelievers in diets, they have been known to go by the motto "if we can catch it, we can eat it," oh nearly forgot you should dress up as a polar bear yourself as well. Learn their body language and smell like one. For if they do turn up for tea and the crumpets are not hot enough they'll eat the host as a sign of dissatisfaction. Personally, I've never been able to eat a whole human being and prefer them cooked whilst polars don't mind at all. And if you just happen to go the whole hog they do like a nice prawn cocktail to start with.

The heat just has a way of getting to my head. I start of the morning quite pleasant and hear or see things which I think would make a good BLOG and then come evening time I've forgotten them. For instance, The news today has advised of a new archive found of material from news feeds and radio broadcasts. One of them they played was of Jane Fonda (Hanoi Jane) saying how she cried for the American soldiers. I could devote an entire blog to the trepidation of having my inlay returned to the recalcitrant tooth. Which happened this afternoon. While I lay there with my mouth opened and the dentist instruments half way down my throat I suddenly became aware of my tongue. It seemed to be pressing against one of the implements and I found myself trying to push it out. I could say how I concentrated on relaxing my breathing as best I could and not gagging either. In the waiting room two African ladies came in while I sat filling in a dental questionnaire. They had a small boy possibly of one or two years in age and a small girl. The boy looked at my shoes and poked them with a little finger. I had left the laces undone, he had such a happy face, I didn't understand a word he said but he seemed pleasant enough. The new receptionist seemed like a young posh cow and was more occupied in chatting to some young male, who I couldn't tell might have been another dentist but I didn't recognise him. I bought a large green melon from the market, it only cost £3 quid, then realised it was heavier than a bowling ball, it was the middle of the day and I'd have to take it home. There's hardly any margarine in the fridge so I wondered about making sandwiches with no marg for tomorrow, then considered it better just to buy from a shop. Later on I took Little Monster Boy out for a walk, he seemed slow and not quite up to his normal ebullient self. He was complaining about his big sister putting on her music loud when he went to bed. Poor thing. The old cat Tigger is looking frailer each day but enjoys being left out in the garden at night because of the heat. He no longer jumps anywhere and now climbs like Scot of the Antarctic. There are many things I could of put in my blog so no wonder picking just a few things can be difficult, and then it's a matter of being in the right writing mood.

Hold on. There's a knock at the door. Of course, it's those damn pesky bears again, OK on with the white suit, crumpets on the grill, kettle on the boil. Now what was the appropriate etiquette greeting?

Sleep to escape

While tucking into a piece of chewing gum it pulled an inlay out of a tooth. Which makes sense, it could hardly pull a reinforced pin from a broken leg. Unfortunately this happened while I was visiting Sparkling. Having been advised the local dentists were butchers who had past a first aid test in dentistry, I had no choice but to put up with it and ring my own dentist. Even though it was a kind of emergency, seeing as the dental material was gradually coming out of the tooth each time I brush my teeth, I still was unable to get an appointment until tomorrow. Although not ideal it will have to do. To remind myself I had to find my inlay and put it in a a pocket for tomorrow I wrote on the back of my hand the word "inlay" in biro. This has haunted me all afternoon and evening until I was prompted by a very sharp memory it was now time to get it ready. Horror of horrors, I could not find it in the place I put it. But I thought to myself, stay calm and you'll find it. So I looked where I had put it and used deduction, taking items out of the draw until it appeared. Miracle of miracles it did appear. With relief I have now put it in an envelope and will get it fixed tomorrow. All I hope is I am not stung an arm and a leg by my dentist, who is generally quite good. Sparkling of course advised me after my inlay had come out, the piece of chewy I had found had been laying about for a while, before I stuck my inlay into it. I don't know if the age of the gum made it tough but next time I'll think twice because I'm quite happy with the teeth I have, and if they have to come out then I'd rather it was in another twenty or thirty years time. The latter preferably.

So this evening I watch the biro'd word on the back of my hand get smudged by sweat as I tried out the treadmill. The first time in a couple of weeks. I cursed myself and even sent a text message to Sparkling asking why it is I didn't exercise when I last saw her, not forgetting why it is I eat so much. Maybe it's love? Being happy and contented makes you eat, lose your inlays and then despair every meal afterwards can only be eaten on one side of your mouth. Needless to say the gym was murder this evening I just hope my heart calms down enough so I can actually get some sleep tonight. I wouldn't mind but the temperature of the house hit 30 degrees Celsius. I opened all the upstairs windows and now it's cooled to 27 degrees Celsius. Hooray. There I was worried about an inlay, heart palpitations and facing a large dental bill when the heat came along and added another straw to this fat man's back.

Sleep comes quickly to the peaceful mind, the pure at heart and the worn out fat ones. All I need now is to be woken up by the cat snoring.