I did something I don't usually do when I hit the gym, I went to the loo, which wasn't unusual, but then I lifted up my t-shirt to see the belly. It was then realisation hit me why I weigh so much, it's not on the hips, lips or tits, well maybe a little on my man boobs, but it is on the belly. A bloody big tractor tyre and I thought tractor tyres were out of fashion. Well they are not and not to far away there is a spare. Tyre or no tyre this did not stop a work out from being pursued. Though it did mean stopping four different times to get my breath and have a drink of water when on the fat man running machine. Me being fat, the machine being for running.
Today I bought a new man perfume from Body Shop called Kistna. It's got a nice fresh citrus like smell to it, but doesn't seem to last long. Tweedle Dee who sits next to me in the Fish Factory tried it out, it was OK he said, but then showed me his Channel man's perfume. It cost fifty quid, then he acknowledged it was an expensive air freshener. When wearing it in the car it drove the women wild, his eyes lit up at this confession. Sounds like he didn't get it for himself than more for his car or any females he gave a lift to. I can't say Kistna does the same, maybe it's just too much like a lemon. From which I guess lemons are not much of an attraction. Don't matter because the only person I want to keep attracting is Sparkling Eyes because she's gorgeous. Perhaps I'm tight, but fifty quid on a men's perfume seems a bit extravagant especially when there's other things it can go on.
It may not do much for my aroma but I did notice there was a rather large wasp flying about upstairs when I got home. It was going around in large slow circles. I thought it might of been something out of a Sci Fi film, about to grow bigger and bigger then to stab me with it's sting, while I was flicking a towel at it. All it needed to get antagonised. I opened a window, but being a rather slow wasp it rather just fly around, so it went into another room. I opened the window in the second room and after a while the buzzing noise stopped. Good, I thought it's found it's way out. Except it just decided to take a break and a kit kat and started up again, it's buzzing becoming more antagonising. I wondered what to do about this, and rather than just go mad and hit it hard with a paperback I had in my hand I stopped. I didn't really want to kill it. After all all animals have the gift of life and we should not do such things, even to insects, if it can be helped. Then I noticed a decorated bottle I had. I took the lid off, found the wasp eating it's tea, miniature crumpets and cream cakes, then slowly put the open bottle on top of the wasp. It buzzed about and was caught inside. Then with a little shake out of the window it went it's merry way although probably with indigestion after being disturbed at tea. I'm sure he liked my man perfume as well, but he didn't stay long enough to comment.
I hear Rock Chick returned today after a weekend of music at T in the Park. She had rung up Sparkling on Sunday and wanted to go home. It had been cold in the tent and she didn't get much sleep. Sparkling unfortunately was unable to drive to Rock Chick's rescue and told her she would have to stay see the final day's bands and the firework display. For three nights Rock Chick had slummed it in a field with 85,000 other visitors to the Park. Rock had spoken to Sparkling on the phone and said it wasn't funny, she must of detected a chuckle in Sparkling's voice. After all it was Sparkling who had done all the hard work and packed Rock Chick off, trying to adviser her of what would be needed. But no, she didn't take the word of her wise mum. Once home Rock was happy she had stayed, sun burnt and saying she was going to do the whole thing again next year. The thing is, had Sparkling actually gone to her rescue then Rock wouldn't of known how good the last day was going to be, or have the complete satisfaction to say she had done it. I suppose this really says sometimes people should not be rescued, a little discomfort never hurt anyone. Personally though, I think i would of preferred a bed to lay in and the option of a shower than walking around for 3 days stinking. Hmmm, I wonder if Rock would like to borrow my Kistna next time?
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