Well it has to happen every now and again. Yep, an unsolicited phone call from a service provider who states they can undercut the cost of the widgets you are presently getting from your current service provider. Now how do you react? Well put the phone down on them, deny you are the person they have asked for, say that person left weeks ago and you have never heard or seen of them, continue the phone call and string them along, because after all it has been quite a boring evening, there's not much on the telly and you have time to spare. Guess what I did? Yep, I took the last option. With the resolve I will change the service provider who has rang me on an unsolicited phone call as soon as I can get my apathetic arse out of my chair.
I spoke to a Geraldine, who was ringing from South Africa. I said firstly I didn't believe her name was Geraldine, she said she was originally from India but now as in South Africa. Geraldine went on to advise me I could save a lot on my telephone calls if I were to change to her service provider's package. I asked her how she knew this and she went on to quote how much it was I was being charged for my phone package. Which although a little disturbing it is probably quite easily available finding out what the standing charge line rental is for any phone company. I then asked her how she could possibly know I would save money in consideration of the phone calls I make and the present package I was on. I don't know if Geraldine was born on a different planet let alone call plan package but she persisted to talk about the standing charge. I said OK Geraldine, what if I find my phone bill with you is actually more expensive than the present phone bill I have, would you allow me to instantly change back to my previous provider? She was a little unsure of her answer her. I think I had her on the ropes for a moment. But there is no stopping a fast talking unsolicited caller. They have only one thing in mind and that is to get the sale. I had only one thing in mind, keep them talking and waste their precious time because all the time Geraldine is talking to me she can't persuade some other unsuspecting sap. So Geraldine continued quoting how much the provider she represented charged, she then went on to another tact as I was showing a little bitty bit of interest. Geraldine asked me if I would ask some security questions. Brilliant I thought. Why should you ask me security questions I asked Geraldine when you are the one who rang me up? She seemed to understand this, but again her fast moving jaw dropped a comment about the Data Protection Act. Great. So I asked what data protection act Geraldine was referring to, was this the 1984 Act or the 1998 Act? Geraldine hadn't a clue. I also asked being that she was in South Africa did these Acts actually apply to her? She said they did. Again I asked her what she knew about these acts. For a millisecond the fast talking phone rep had a pause. It was quite clear she didn't have a bloody clue. Her next tact was to get out of the conversation by stating if I was unable to answer the security questions then she would have to terminate the call. I had at last hit the bloody jackpot. The call didn't last much longer. I thanked Geraldine for her phone call, wondered whether I should get a stop watch for the next unsolicited call and see how long I could string them along. How long I could make their life hell for ringing me up when I didn't want, ask or need them to talk to me. The conversation still hadn't lasted long enough for my liking, I really have got to learn to keep them strung along a bit more.
I can only wonder if there is an Olympic medal for keeping unsolicited telephone reps on the phone for as long as possible. For the best delaying tactics. Hmm, I could of said I needed to take a pan of boiling milk off the stove and put down the phone for a moment, but then it would of given Geraldine a chance to close the call and let someone else take it as soon as I picked up the phone again. On the other hand I may have just talked myself out of saving a few pennies. What a bloody shame it would of been.
Geraldine, if you are reading this give me another call, you might of had a point or two, but I just need to clarify a couple of things, hold on, some one's at the door, don't go away now...
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